Lindsay Lohan is dropping her surname and will now be referred to only as “Lindsay.” Because “Dirtyslutwhore” was already taken. (Post Chronicle)

How much photoshopping did it take to make Britney Spears look like this for Femme Fatale? (G Celeb)

That chick from “Community” works a giant clay phallus while Joel McHale stares in wonder. (Dirty Rotten Whore)

Who’s hotter: Star Fucker, or Osama Chin Laden? Only your vote can decide! (The Dirty)

Ryan Seacrest gives Rebecca Black his seal of approval. Which is precisely why Ryan Seacrest sucks. (TMZ)

Whoopi Goldberg says she was stoned off her ass in her Oscar acceptance speech. (Agent Bedhead)

I really like the fat kid in the Diary of a Wimpy Kid movies. I can’t help it. Maybe it’s the way her lipsyncs that Kesha song. (Pajiba)

Hayden Panettiere looks like she’s lost a ton of weight. Her thighs are a good five inches smaller. (Celeb Slam)

George Lopez engages Kirstie Alley in a fatty war. That’s the pockmarked pot calling the kettle fat. (Evil Beet)

Olivia Munn tries to do a Princess Leia and fails miserably. (Hollywood Rag)

Reese Witherspoon and Robert Pattinson put on their shiny tights and leotards for Entertainment Weekly. (Socialite Life)

Lacey Schwimmer has an unbelievable body… and she knows it. (Moe Jackson)

Emmy Rossum looks like a clown on crack at the Met. I guess Christina Aguilera’s makeup artist is freelancing now. (Drunken Stepfather)

Vanessa Hudgens is wearing a nice babushka with that slutty miniskirt. (Popoholic)

Adriana Lima never disappoints. (Gone Hollywood)

Justin Bieber is cheating on Selena Gomez with Jasmine Villegas. I’d gasp with horror if I cared. (Anything Hollywood)

Prince Williams’ bachelor party is sure to include tea and strumpets. Get it? Strumpets? God let this day be over soon. (Bitten & Bound)

Jessica Biel isn’t so much dating Gerard Butler as she is stalking him. (Celebitchy)

Johnny Depp loves a good fart joke, according to Penelope Cruz. (The Fab Life)

The biggest bare boobs I’ve ever seen at a fashion show. They’re amazing. (Celeb Jihad)