In this hilarious video, Tara Reid tries in vain to get waved into Hollywood hotspot Hyde as Paris Hilton and her new BFF Kim Kardashian breeze inside. It looks like Tara’s popularity is sagging. Like her boobies.
Lindsay: Look, I shaved my armpits. Now I’m going to work… on my suntan. See you after the jump!
Paris Hilton told the press that her album is so good it makes her cry. Now that her musical debut is widely seen as a certified flop, she’s probably crying even more. Her album “Paris,” which features the single “Stars Are Blind,” reportedly sold a lackluster 75,000 copies in the United States - a pittance compared to Christina Aguilera’s first-week sales of 320,000. And it will get even worse, as projected sales for next week are said to be a measly 30,000, which is a larger than normal second week drop. “Paris” is languishing at the bottom of Billboard’s Hot 100 - so Hilton’s label rushed out her second single, “Turn It Up,” which isn’t doing very well either. One industry source told Page Six:
“The international outlook is not much better for her. The international people are not inclined to do a big push since she can’t back up the album with a tour. Obviously, she can’t sing live.”
Nobody wants to hear the heiress sing and people are obviously scared to have sex with her. Elijah Blue Allman, the hunky son of Cher and Gregg Allman, boasted to Howard Stern the other day that he had a fling with Hilton before she was famous - but he got nervous right afterward that he might have picked up a sexually transmitted disease from her. Allman says he was so worried, he raced downstairs and grabbed a household cleaning product to pour over his private parts and “disinfect” them. Paris is obviously not a singer, but a virus.
Bai Ling lets her nipple out at a Pre-Emmy party. [The Bastardly]
Conan O’Brien kicked ass at the Emmys. [Popoholic]
Watch the “Emmy Nip Slip,” featuring Mindy Kaling. [Best Week Ever]
Kevin Federline lands a role in CSI. [Celebitchy]
Find the getaway car and fill the tank with some free gas. [iVillage]
Charlie Theron recently took her 500 dogs to Malibu Beach and she threw more than 3,000 sticks to entertain them. Only 2 sticks were brought back by the pets. It’s not that they are lazy, but they were too busy admiring their sexy master.
More pics after the jump.
Kid Rock wants you to believe that he didn’t marry Pamela Anderson because he fell in love with her boobies but because she touched his heart. According to Page Six, Job the Raver, bassist from the Cursed, told Steppin’ Out gadfly Chaunce Hayden the other night at Headquarters Gentlemen’s Club that his pal Kid Rock once told him:
“I’ve been with nearly every woman out there. I’ve had hundreds of strippers and models. But nobody touched my heart like Pam. She truly is the love of my life.”
I often call it schlong, willy or dick, but I never heard someone call a penis a “heart.”
The 2006 Emmy Awards came and went last night and celebrities once again did their best to bring the best-looking surgically enhanced boobies on the red carpet. Katherine Heigl is my favorite pick this year. Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jaime Pressly, Vanessa Minnillo and Lisa Rinna receive a honorable mention. All that cleavage nearly made me forget that the Emmys are also an award ceremony. So for those interested, there’s a full list of the winners available here.
More pics after the jump.
According to “South Park” creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker, Saddam Hussein is going through the worst torture in jail. The former Iraqi leader, who is currently behind bars in Iraq as he stands trial on charges of genocide, is being forced to watch himself in “South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut” over and over again. The movie was banned in Iraq on its launch in 1999 for showing Saddam as the Devil’s gay lover. Speaking at the Edinburgh International Television Festival, Matt revealed that US Marines guarding the former dictator during his trial for genocide were making him watch the movie “repeatedly”. He said:
“I have it on pretty good information from the Marines on detail in Iraq that they showed him the movie. That’s really adding insult to injury. I bet that made him really happy.”
That’s not what I would call torture, as “South Park” is one of the funniest show ever. If US marines want to torture Saddam, they should force him to watch a season of “American Idol” or “Survivor.”
Create your own “Black Snake Moan” trailer. [Popoholic]
Kirsten Dunst tells us which is her middle finger. [The Bastardly]
A site where people post their photos taken with famous people. [Celeb Safari, via Cityrag]
Watch a hilarious video of Axl Rose in 2014. [Glizzy]
Now angry socialites can harm you with their bling. [CubeMe]
Here’s Heather Locklear out and about in Hollywood in a see thru-skirt and no panties. I used to fantasize about her when she played officer Stacy Sheridan in “T.J. Hooker.” That was 20 years ago and she hasn’t changed much since then. I’d like to say that her beauty is timeless but Time is a relentless bitch. The truth is that her plastic surgeon is very talented.
More pics after the jump.
William H. Macy has criticized Lindsay Lohan for keeping people waiting on set. The freckled whore was recently attacked by a studio executive for consistently arriving late for work on her new movie “Georgia Rule,” and although Macy admires her talent, he says she has no manners. The veteran actor recently worked with Lohan on “Bobby,” and when asked about the experience he reportedly paused then replied: “She was pretty late.” He added:
“I think what an actor has to realize is that when you show up an hour late, 150 people have been scrambling to cover for you. There is not an apology big enough in the world to have to make 150 people scramble. It’s nothing but disrespect. And Lindsay Lohan is not the only one. A lot of actors show up late as if they’re God’s gift to the film. It’s inexcusable, and they should have their asses kicked.”
I totally agree with that. I’d rather work with wacko actors who take their job seriously than with talentless whores who don’t show any respect.
Vanessa: I lend him my ass and he gives me the media attention I need.
More pics after the jump.