Dec 14, 2006
Jessica Biel is Snotty
Jessica Biel took a little time out from doing outdoor lunges to take her dog for an early morning walk yesterday. Anybody else smearing nasal mucous all over their sleeve would have made me sick, but Jessica’s hotness manages to negate it. It’s pretty hard to mess up that kind of foxiness. She could be two knuckles deep in her own ass crack and I’d still think she looked sexy. Because she’s touching Jessica Biel’s ass. See how that works? I’m sure there’s some kind of mathematical formula to explain it, but I’m more of a “fundamental theory” kind of girl than an honest-to-goodness physicist. You’ll have to look it up.
14 Comments, Comment or Ping
Walrus Gumboot
No Jessica Biel issnot !!!
Dec 14th, 2006
nrrvus
I could make her snottier, in a good way, for me that is.
Dec 14th, 2006
abby
I heard her ass grants wishes, if you can get close enough to actually rub it.
Dec 14th, 2006
oshkoshb'huckleberry
I wonder if she poops too…
nah!
Dec 14th, 2006
omgwtf
wow, it must suck to have so little creativity that you have to rip off idontlikeyouinthatway. even your *commenters* are cheap ripoffs of the ones over there.
i’d totally hate to be you. :*(
Dec 14th, 2006
oshkoshb'huckleberry
Yes, I am totally ripping off commenter “crzychica256″ who makes these off the wall observations and jokes the likes of which have never before been seen by mankind… and I get so mad because I didn’t think of them first that I come here and vent under this guise that the anonymity of the internet has provided me. Damn you IDontLikeYouInThatWay.com!!!! Damn you for always being one step ahead of me, no matter how many sleepless nights I spend conjuring up new comments or tossing and turning having nightmares of not being the most original person in the realm of internet gossip websites!
Dec 14th, 2006
abby
And all this time I thought I was ripping off The Superficial. Damn those crafty bastards for copyrighting sarcasm!!
Dec 14th, 2006
Italian Stallion
Wow, it must suck to have so little creativity that you have to say shit about a site and it’s commenters instead of saying something intelligent or funny. While we’re on the subject, it must suck for you to have a sore asshole all year round. Oh, and no friends. Oh yeah, can’t forget to add how much of a stupid fuck you are…………
WEDONTLIKEYOUPERIOD.fuckoff.com
Dec 14th, 2006
bionic bunny
oshy, you forgot about watching the clock so you can say “FIRST!”
that one gives me nightmares.
Dec 14th, 2006
Walrus Gumboot
omgwtf - KISS MY BIG BLACK ASS!!!
Abby IS the original of all time!
Dec 14th, 2006
abby
Thanks, y’all! You know, I should have patented my own personal style of funny. Seems like everybody wants a piece of my fucking pie these days. And I mean that in every sexually suggestive way possible.
Dec 14th, 2006
Monica
I just don’t see the fascination with her. She looks like a regular chick with a big butt who’s really into girl love. I don’t see what hot Chris Evans and gorgeous Derek Jeter sees in her other than they both want to say they got in the pants of Sexiest woman of the year. Seeing both are ladies men, that may be the whole idea.
Dec 14th, 2006
Walrus Gumboot
Nobody bad mouths the geek Abby while I’m around!
Dec 15th, 2006
Studly Stud
the thing is Monica it’s one hot ass
Dec 18th, 2006
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