Mariah Carey’s Clothes Don’t Fit

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Mariah Carey was seen leaving her hotel in London yesterday in a pair of pre-teen glittered jeans and a leather jacket straining at the seams. Like at any moment the coat might explode, and all of the bulging flesh strapped inside would come barreling out in an torrent of cellulite and fat-roll sweat and knock down little children and vacationing tourists. Jesus. I’ve seen casing on a sausage that didn’t fit so snugly. The sausage wasn’t quite as fat or annoying as Mariah, of course, but I think you still get my point. Fat people are just disgusting.

More glittery chubbiness after the jump.

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41 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. sonya

    Sausage also happens to taste better than Mariah.

  2. abby

    And smell better, too.

  3. RichPort

    I would nail her like a coked up carpenter. I realize she’s both vapid and annoying, but ass like that makes me giddy. I’d just like her to scream, in her best falsetto, Somedaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay when she climaxes. Then I’d call her a fat nasty whore because I’m fucked up like that.

  4. beerdotcom

    Eminem should beat the holy hell out of this bitch as part of his stage act.

  5. One pill makes you larger

    Yeah…………..SHE’S SO FUCKING HUGE……..

    Please!!!

  6. Tine

    She is mammoth and should stay indoors. Looks like Britney puked on her jeans.

  7. alice

    she’s not fat at all. i mean, i’m all for making fun of fat people, but her stomach is like completely flat so…?

  8. Butch

    Soooooo…. am I to take this to mean that you will NOT be buying the latest issue of Playboy that features Mariah?

  9. Personally, I hope she spends a bit of money for voice lessons. I thought a cat was being ‘alien probed’ last time I heard a song of hers on the radio.

  10. Tine

    She’s fat like Tyra.

  11. Nice fucking fade on the crotchal-region of those jeans. Who styles this wench?

    It’s one thing to have a stylist suggest an outfit for you. But it’s another thing to be a big enough douche bag to actually wear the shit. But I digress. Douchebaggery works in mysterious ways, my friends.

  12. RichPort

    If I ran into her, I’d be committed to hit it.

  13. With your car Rich?

  14. mimi

    all of you are stupid idots do you see rolls? NO!! if she was fat you would see rolls over her jeans n under te coat but you cant soooo i suggest u get a life n dont hate her because you aint her

  15. Mimi! What a riot you are!

  16. sonya

    mimi you really n eed 2 get n ejucashun cuz u dun spell bad.

  17. sonya

    and smell bad.

  18. bionic bunny

    trollin’, trollin’, trollin’ on da riveahhh!

    does MC have gills on her thighs?

    okay, we talk about mariah carey and jim carrey……
    whatever happened to DREW carey??

  19. LadyJane

    Mariah drives me to drink copious amount os booze and punch my monitor in a rage. I hate this fucking bitch more than anyone.

  20. Miss Mariah

    you know u people are so cruel. Mariah probably has a hard enought time trying to stay as slim as she is for her career and I think she is doing a good job. If she let herself go and did’nt give a f–k she would be bubbling over her jeans so leave her alone and give the lady some love. What have she ever done to any of you b’s.

  21. butch

    Sonja, Mimi don’t need an edumacation…she speaking “ghetto” and keepin it real.

  22. creativity zen

    this is “fat”? her clothes are just too tight.

    beauty standards really are warped these days.

  23. Jill

    I don’t think Mariah looks fat at ALL…I think she looks really good, and to make fun of people who are not even CLOSE to overweight for being “fat” really is lame. And…on a related topic….Britney Spears doesn’t look NEARLY as good as she used to, that’s a fact…but she’s also had 2 kids. Give her a break. She’s still thinner than more than half of the general population in America…so, poeple, PLEASE…if your muscle mass isn’t equivalent to hers, if you are one size bigger, you have no room to talk. And the same goes for Mariah Carey. She’s got lots of muscle, and if you don’t have that kind of muscle on your body, you have no room to comment on her physique.

  24. IAN

    maybe its her 100% sperm diet she’s on, being the a filthy whore that she is, god I love her

    she really isn’t fat though, she still looks great

  25. Dillet

    Oh, please. The outfit is atrocious, but her body looks good. There’s nothing fat or disgusting about it. This post is not snarky, it’s just stupid.

  26. babiee-k

    well i think mariah carey is gr8 so will u all stop bein bitchy 2 her n she is not fat

  27. babiee-k

    well i think ur all fukin grim tht poor girl is tryin 2 keep her figure but ur all dissin her u woudn’n like it if sum1 was dissin u. exactly n mimi ur rite. y dnt u all pick on sum1 ur own size.

  28. babiee-k

    look nun of u a8 gt nufin 2 say nw coz u all no i am rite

  29. Pengu333

    who cares if her clothes dont fit…she is pretty

  30. rampedup

    I like porky fat bitches that have alot of money. I’d fuck her until she squealed like the fat little pig bitch she is.

  31. glen adams

    the jacket does absolutly zero.
    if only she had a life

  32. Alexandra

    Guys please shes stuck in the 90s era shes enjoying the little time she has left until she turns 4o yrs old … Lets let her enjoy her 30s pretending to be 22 yrs old again … No shes not fat shes just alittle embarrassing thats it … Shes needs a man and a friend thats all .. But she still has her voice at least !

  33. Catinego

    Why are you all being such haters. Man, so you don’t like superficial anorexic people, but yet someone like mariah is considered fat. That’s low. And what did she ever do to deserve such hatred. Why do you all hate her so much? Did she personally do anything to you? And why make fun of bigger people? Just because there a bigger size, it’s really fun to make fun of them. People like you say they don’t like superficial people, but yet bigger people disgust you. I say your just like the superficial people then, if you believe that beauty means stick skinny. People don’t do stuff, and try to look good for everyones approval because they know some people can never appreciate real beauty or talent. And that some will stick with their ideas of pretty, and to them you’ll never be pretty. Some people are so shallow that to reach to their level you have to sleep with them. The world has become a cold place for sure, and the standards have become too high for the average person to meet. It’s people like you who belittle people who have low self- esteem.

  34. X-Dawg21

    u mutha fuckers must think u have to be some anorexic hoe in order to look right. she isn’t fat that should be normal not fucking fat unless u guys are fucking twigs. this shits fucked man.

    ___________________________________________________________________

    What it do homey Dis is life bitches

  35. Stephanie

    Damn. I wish I was that fat.

  36. Aly

    So, can someone prove to me that all this hatred has a purpose. Because all I see is a bunch of idiotic low-lifes making fun of a person that has done nothing to them. I think it’s jealousy hidden behind insecurity, you just really want the life that Mariah Carey has, eh? You just secretly desire to be one of the most sucsessful female recording artists and have numerous awards, including Artist of the Decade, 17 #1 singles and millions of fans worldwide, not to mention a five octave voice, and a damn good one at that. You’re just really that jealous? You just can’t be happy for her, no, you fantasize to be her and to hide that you cover it with hatred when you probably have a shrine at home and some sick and twisted fan club that discusses about Mariahs pubic hair, and how Ron did a great job photoshopping her last outfit off, and you all have a huge naked photoshopped Mariah gallery on your wall with your sick and twisted friends because you can’t seem to be happy for a persons sucsess, no, you have to be jealous of it. That is sad. Well then, since you wanna be her so badly, pick your life up, get off the computer since it’s always the sick and ugly computer geeks who type this stuff, find out you have talent, (if you don’t, which is probably true then develop a talent over time, or, if you’re in that much of a rush, fake a talent and become famous, just know that your secret will be found out and then you’ll crash and burn and enter rehab, just warning you) So there. Hopefully you’ll take down this dissapointment for a website and go do something with your life other then trash celebrities you secretly desire to be. Go get a life you dumb bastards.

  37. MY QUESTION IS…WHY IS SHE STILL DRESSING LIKE A TEENAGER?THAT BROAD IS AT LEAST 35,TIME TO PUT IT AWAY.YOUR TRAIN HAS LEFT 5-6 YEARS AGO!!!

  38. kaykay

    what the hell are you guys tlking about she looks amazing

    jusy cause u guys are ugly ass holes dosent mean you have to put someone else down

    so go fuck off!!!

  39. Robban

    I looking forward to see the coat exploding. Is not so fairaway. She being fatter and fatter, tragic people.

  40. Jess

    You people are ridiculous. She looks like a healthy woman, not a starving, pre-pubescent little girl. Check back when you’re 37 and tell me how fat she is.

  41. ashley

    I swear a lot of people now days are f***ed up. Who ever thinks that mariah carey is fat needs some f-ing help because do you see any rolls…nope didn’t think so! Seriously WTF! I hate it when people say that Mariah and Tyra are fat, I think its just ugly ass people who hate them because you ain’t them. Even if she were fat why should she be as skinny and sick looking as paris or lohan…? You dont have to be skinny like that to be beautiful.

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