Danny Bonaduce Gyrates His Manparts

Former Child Star/Reality Trainwreck Danny Bonaduce celebrated the end of his marriage to wife Gretchen last night by throwing a “Divorce Party” at the Key Club in Hollywood. Bonaduce took to the stage clad only in tiny little underpants — prancing his weird, ripply body around and accosting some poor innocent stripper by shoving his junk into her face. (You can watch the footage here.)
I have to warn you though, that video is pretty much horrifying. After seeing it, my vaginny turned itself inside out and hung up a comically placed “Closed for the Season” sign. I can only imagine how the poor stripper made out. After a run-in with Bonaduce Schlong — she’s probably lying in a psychiatric hospital somewhere, her eyes wide open in terror and self induced scratches running down her face. Although they’ll probably put her in the same ward with people who ill-advisedly watched the Screech sex tape, so at least she’s in good company.

5 Comments, Comment or Ping
Osbourne Black
Yeah but, “Danny got Reuben to sell our song and it really came together when mom sang along.”
Jun 1st, 2007
Dragulf
Closed for the season! Now I’m depressed.
Jun 1st, 2007
bionic bunny
i’m surprised he has any dangly bits left. i thought he also abused steroids.
my father would never let me watch “the partridge family” because “keith” had long hair. i am NOT kidding!
i had a divorce party. it was really cool. my folks and their friends brought a small wedding cake with a bride in black. and if THAT doesn’t tell you what an asshole he was, i don’t know what does. i guess my dad lightened up a bit, eh?
TMI. sorry.
and i’m NOT watching that video.
Jun 1st, 2007
litelysalted
Hee!!!!!! Because he had long hair! LOVE it. And that’s not my pinot grigio talking, either.
I would have a divorce party, if I ever got divorced from my commonlaw marriage. But I probably wouldn’t shove my junk in a stripper’s face, and on that note — good choice not to watch the video.
Jun 1st, 2007
Samuella
After I watched that, I expected someone to call me whispering “seven dayssssss”.
Jun 3rd, 2007
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