Lindsay Lohan Steals Cocaine

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“Jackass” imbecile Steve-O told fellow imbecile Howard Stern yesterday that Lindsay Lohan once stole a bag of cocaine from him. According to Page Six

The freaky comic, who laughed uncontrollably while saying he likes to inhale nitrous oxide from whipped cream cans, said Lohan took the “Boog Suge” from him after she forgot her wallet in his bathroom and came back to his place to get it. There’s even proof she was there - Lohan had to sign a release while at Steve-O’s house for a DVD he was filming at the time.

The asswipe factor of this post is practically incalculable. It’s like I’m drowning in sea of douchebaggery and all I’ve got to cling to is a fucktard rope. Jesus. Well, it’s a fact that anyone who publicly refers to blow as “the boog sug” deserves to have their stash stolen. Same goes for people who call marijuana “the wacky tobaccky” and pussy “daddy’s beef stroganoff.” Really, it’s all I can do to even type words that gay. Just having read them already makes you 42% uncooler, according to a USA Today gallup poll. Loser!

More of Lohan outside rehab after the jump.

What’s the secret behind her glowing complexion? Why, cigarettes, of course!

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14 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. ravinglooney

    She seems to be morphing into Courtney Love

  2. RichPort

    She looks like she just shaved her upper lip.

  3. abby

    I noticed that! Or else the lower half of her face is covered in dirt. She looks dirty, and not the good kind of dirty, either. Margot Kidder-in-the-bushes kinda dirty. Barf.

  4. Otto the Short Yellow Bus Driver

    That’s not dirt on her lower lip, that’s an herpes outbreak on her lower lip. She must have been kissing Courtney the other night. Remember kids, the price is $20 for a half-and-half in the public restroom, but be sure to carry a condem, she doesn’t supply them.

  5. supes182

    Amazing. Ass. Horrible. Everything else.

  6. Man, she has really gone downhill.

  7. richa

    this is pretty hilarious. if you guys want, you can vote on tags of hers like “doesn’t always wear underwear” or “busted for coke” here: http://www.spock.com/Lindsay-Lohan/tags/vote/doesn‘t always wear underwear
    it’s pretty fun.. you can also go through more pics of her and vote on those:
    http://www.spock.com/Lindsay-Lohan/pictures/vote/693243
    some of them are a lot hotter than the ones you see here…

  8. shame, shame lindsay get your own ya can afford it

  9. marius

    that jackass motherfucker is a liar

  10. joy

    I fucking laughed my fat ass off at this post and I’m not sure why.

  11. Cookie

    I cannot wait till this hoe to OD! She also needs some fucking coaching on how to dress…as well as keeping her funking box and bought tit’s from popping out!

  12. LINSDAY IS SOOOO UGLY I MEAN ALL SHE HAS GOIN FOR HER OUR HER BOOBS AND SHE WHITE U KNO SHE AINT GOT NO ASS HAHAHAHAHAHA

  13. She is amusing to watch.

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