What Did David Copperfield Do?

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David Copperfield’s Las Vegas warehouse was raided by FBI agents Wednesday night, and among the evidence seized was a computer hard drive, a digital camera system, and roughly $2 million in cash. According to People:

“The only thing we’re confirming right now is that there was some investigative activity in the Las Vegas area yesterday connected with a Seattle-area case, both of which are pending,” said Robbie Burroughs, spokeswoman for the Seattle division of the FBI.

Copperfield’s attorney, David Chesnoff, says in a statement: “We understand there is an investigation, (we) are in touch with the investigators, and are respecting the confidentiality of the investigation.”

Since there’s nothing I love like wild and unfounded speculation — What Did David Copperfield Do? My money’s on kiddie porn, but the possibilities are really endless. Was it diamond smuggling? Orchestration of a Malaysain sex slave ring? Opium trade? Illegal white tiger breeding? No wait, that’s those other guys… Okay, how about bestiality, with a — wait for it — reptile? Boy! All this speculation sure puts a twinkle in my eye and makes me feel like a kid on Christmas morning! It’s all quite — well, magical, really.

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13 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. His first show at the Federal Pen will feature him making the penises of several large men disappear into his rectum.

  2. I think it has something to do with OJ
    Everything does

  3. Yup either OJ or Global Warming, in fact, everything that’s not OJ related has to do with global warming.

  4. I vote kiddie porn- trafficed across state lines, usually the only reason the feebs will show up.

  5. He probably has the missing homemade porn video he did with Sig and Roy. Most likely he was blackmailing them with the threat of releasing it on the internet. Which wouldn’t be to bad expect for the fact endangered exotic animals were involved. Because in Vegas its about the fabled tiger show unlike TJ where where the show only features a donkey. By the way, they have a two-drink minimum if you go.

  6. Could all of you be teenagers and just like to start the rumors flying? Sounds like it to me. The man is not guilty until proven guilty!! Then again, only mindless people would think the worse!!

  7. If we were mindless we wouldn’t think at ALL, douche-hat.

  8. Even if he’s innocent of kiddie porn he’s still guilty of excessive douche-ness. And that is a FACT.
    Two thumbs up, ass-wipe.

  9. mr.David Copperfield please make otto disappear

  10. The Truth is out there!

    Slim, funny as always.

  11. I always found him greasy and sleazy…kiddie porn could be it.

  12. IsaNo Gravatar

    Seattle news said it has to do with him raping some chick. I’m so shocked.

  13. Shouldn’t the $2 million be in an interest bearing account? Learn to make your money work for you, David.

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