Britney Invites K-Fed to Birthday Bash
Tags: Britney Spears, Kevin Federline
No birthday party is complete without a drunken 1 a.m. booty call to an ex-husband. You know, the one who has custody of the children while you’re out lumbering around a dance floor in a fur coat with a cosmo and a smoke in your grubby paws. Page Six reports
Spears wanted to call her ex-husband, Kevin Federline - but had to borrow [Paris] Hilton’s cellphone “because she could not find her own,” [said] a source. Spears invited Federline to join her at the club during the 1 a.m. call. “She begged him to come out with her,” a source said, “[but] Kevin reminded her that one of them needed to be a parent and take care of the boys. Then she hung up on him.”
I imagine the conversation ended with Britney yelling “Well, fuck you, then, you fuckin’ boy scout!” and then slamming the cell phone down on the table. And then slamming it again. And again, and again, and finally pounding it against the table top like a monkey with a coconut because “the stupid fuckin’ phone won’t fuckin’ hang up already!” before she threw up in a gift bag.
More from the birthday party:
9 Comments, Comment or Ping
RichPort
I similarly rejected her pre-dawn advances, as I prefer whacking off to necrophilic animal porn to having to chat it up with Brit about the nature of rednecks after splooging on her face and forcing to her peel it off after it dries. Hey, I have standards too.
Dec 4th, 2007
abby
Her hair looks gorgeous. She’s like a Vidal Sassoon commercial come to life.
Dec 4th, 2007
RichPort
Vidal Sassoon would cry on his boyfriend’s lap at that statement, Abby.
Dec 4th, 2007
agita
I especially love the big wad of gum in hamhocks mouth..it’s just adds to the charm, y’all.
Dec 4th, 2007
supes
Mongo’s got a forehead like a drive in movie screen.
Dec 4th, 2007
open mouth jones
I remember a time when she was at least sort of attractive. At least you could bounce a dime off her ass back in the day, now the only bouncing going on is her enormous jiggly thighs when she sees a taco bell bathroom she hasn’t infected yet.
Dec 4th, 2007
simpsonsistershavezerotalent
Mental illness is very serious and Brtiney should be locked up in a padded room.
er her hair is wig…
Dec 4th, 2007
Dragulf
Brit-Brit, we know that’s not your real hair, ya brain dead cow!
Dec 4th, 2007
bionic bunny
eh, rich, what’s the diff?
oh. nevermind.
Dec 4th, 2007
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