Madonna continued her promotional tour for her new album “Hard Candy” by regurgitating last week’s performance in Paris yesterday. But wait… what’s this? It appears that she’s kissing another woman! Egad! And all the while holding bottle of champagne, from which she will no doubt drink directly! Such scandal! Such debauchery! Always pushing the envelope, that Madonna! Next, she will do something even more shocking, like make light of the crucifixion or publish a (NSFW) book of nude and sexually ambiguous black and white photos! 2003 also promises to be a year of aeronautical disasters and Eastern Asia SARS outbreaks! Stay tuned!

You can tell how hip and down with the young people Madonna is by the way she drank champagne directly from the bottle during a promotional performance in New York City last night. The Daily Mail says

She performed six songs for around 2,000 people at the Roseland Ballroom, at one point stopping to guzzle champagne from the bottle. Madonna spent almost every second of her No. 1 track Four Minutes grinding against Justin Timberlake, despite being well and truly old enough to be his mother.

Then she screamed something like “I take the drugs and do lots of sex and watch the internet all day and night!” Get it? You know, like an old person trying to sound cool? I guess it sorta came out more like a lame Borat impersonation. Almost as lame as I just made this post. Almost.