Madonna opens up about her early battles against societally-imposed standards of beauty in this month’s “green issue” of Vanity Fair. And for the record, we’re talking about this chick right here. This chick and her Ani DiFranco-esque fight against bleaching, waxing, shaving and rouging. Us Weekly quotes her as saying

“I was one of those people that people were mean to. I didn’t shave my legs. I had hair growing under my arms. I refused to wear makeup, or fit the ideal of what a conventionally pretty girl would look like.’”

To her credit, she doesn’t look like a conventionally pretty girl in the above picture. She looks like a young Larry Bird or an albatross that’s just had all its feathers ripped out in some kind of bizarre glue gun accident. I don’t know whether to start shouting career stats at it or toss it some krill and squid and hope it doesn’t bite me.