Everyone’s been speculating as to what went wrong between Crystal Harris and Hugh Hefner, but I bet none of you considered the fact that she had been planning the split for weeks and timed it in order to capitalize on a “I Left Hugh at the Altar” made-for-TV movie deal she was negotiating behind his back. Gold-diggers the world over tip their hat to you, Ms. Harris. This is the part where you golf clap and nod approvingly. Page Six says:
Hugh Hefner’s wedding to Crystal Harris was called off after she secretly planned to ditch the Playboy mogul at the altar in return for a $500,000 media deal.
Harris, 25, was shopping for a big-bucks deal to tell all after she ditched hapless Hef, 85, in front of 300 guests at their wedding at the Playboy Mansion on Saturday, to be filmed for a Lifetime TV special.
A source told us, “Crystal wanted to ditch Hef at the altar. Her plan was to walk up the aisle and say she couldn’t go through with it. The wedding was to be filmed for a reality special, and her refusal to marry him would be a sensation. She was looking for a tie-in deal of around $500,000 for the exclusive ‘I ditched Hef at the altar’ interview. While there was interest, Crystal didn’t get an offer anywhere near half a million.”
It is not known if the Sunday argument was sparked by Hef finding out about her plan to humiliate him.
The last-minute cancellation is unfortunate timing for Playboy, considering its July issue hits newsstands tomorrow with “The New Mrs. Crystal Hefner!” on the cover. The Daily Mail says:
‘Recent events call for a special sticker on the July cover. Look for it on newsstands,’ Hefner said on Twitter.
A big red sticker announcing ‘Runaway Bride In This Issue!’ covers most of Harris’ bottom half.
She is wearing his trademark sailor’s cap and smoking jacket, and holding a pipe.
A spokeswoman said the sticker would appear only on newsstand copies since issues have already been mailed to subscribers.
And with that crumbles the last vestiges of the playboy persona Hugh’s worked so many decades to cultivate. He’s not America’s swingin’ bachelor, flanked by beautiful women who adore him; he’s an unwitting punchline, a sad, old man that got cuckolded and played like cheap banjo, surrounded by whores who tolerate him for a chance at brief notoriety. Still being to wipe himself is about all he’s got going for him now.