An incarcerated murderer hired two men (mug shots here and here) to kill and castrate Justin Bieber at his Madison Square Garden show late last month because he was “obsessed” with the singer and wanted Bieber’s testicles. I SWEAR I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP. The NY Post says:
One of the men was busted upstate on Nov. 20 — allegedly with pruning shears that were to be used to cut off Bieber’s manhood at a price of $2,500 for each testicle, according to court documents.
Tanner Ruane, 23, and his ex-con uncle Mark Staake, 41, were supposed to strangle 18-year-old Bieber and his bodyguard with a paisley tie at the singer’s late November show at the Garden, then castrate them both.
The sickening scheme supposedly was set in motion by Dana Martin, 45, who is serving a life sentence for the 2000 rape and murder of a 15-year-old Vermont girl named DeAndra Fiorucci — whom he strangled with a paisley tie.
Castrate Justin Bieber? Ha ha, irony! And P.S., no way you’d get twenty-five hundred a ball. Not in this economy. You’re a lot better off investing in T-bills and short-term municipal bond funds. The testicle market never really recovered after the housing market crashed.
If you’re going to do denim, start here, because only the gay rodeo needs metal studs or leather accents on their shirts (see Justin Bieber in NY last month, below).