If you thought the White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner was sorely lacking in the blowjob and vodka department, your laments have finally been addressed — Lindsay Lohan will be attending this year’s dinner courtesy of Fox News. The Washington Post says:

Fox News’ Greta Van Susteren and her husband, John Coale, are bringing Lohan to the annual celeb-political event at the Washington Hilton on Saturday. Which means the off-probation actress will probably be hitting the D.C. party scene Friday and Saturday nights.

Interestingly, this will be the first year the White House forgoes the sterling for plastic forks and spoons, and all female guests have been instructed not to wear jewelery or check their coats. And you can forget about the open bar. On the plus side, the Secret Service has never been more stoked.

At Star’s “All Hollywood” event last night: