Paris Hilton Pleads Guilty to Drug, Lying Charges

Paris Hilton plead guilty to misdemeanor drug possession today in order to avoid jail time stemming from her August arrest in Las Vegas. According to TMZ:

In exchange she must pay $2,000 in fines, complete 200 hours of community service and complete an “intensive” substance abuse program. She will also be on probation for one year.

The judge informed Paris that she has been given a one year suspended sentence — which means if she is arrested for anything other than a minor traffic violation, she will spend 1 year behind bars.

I thought Lady Justice was supposed to carry a sword. Apparently if you’re a celebrity, it’s really more of a rubber dildo. And she’s not so much wielding it as she is shoving it in her own ass and crying.

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