Is this irony? Snooki tells off New Jersey’s infamous tanning mom. (The Stir)

I love me some Isabel Lucas and Jaime King. Amy Adams I could take or leave. (Moe Jackson)

It’s hot dogs. It’s whores. It’s mobile. It sounds like everything you’d want out of life, except it’s also 45 years old with a high school equivalency. (Hollywood Rag)

Megan Fox shuts down her Entertainment Tonight interview after fielding pregnancy questions. “Show your tits!” a disillusioned audience member is said to have yelled. Okay, so it was me. But for the record, I WAS disillusioned. (Celebitchy)

Now this is how you do Cinco de Mayo — Sofia Vergara and Jessica Alba for twice the Hispanic hotness! (Celeb Slam)

Yes, but how did Britney Spears celebrate Cinco de Mayo? I’m assuming just like me, by making her liver wish it were still a cluster of stem cells. (Evil Beet)

You can tell that “Spring Breakers” is gonna be a terrific movie by the way all the underage girls are in bikinis. “How Green Was My Valley” can suck it. (The Blemish)

Rihanna pulls a Lindsay Lohan at the SNL dress rehearsal! No, she wasn’t busted doing coke and blowing a soundstage guy in Lorne Michael’s dressing room — I meant that she was a no-show. Glad we cleared that up. (INF Daily)

I would totally take a big bite out of that ass. Because it’s actually a tomato. See what I did there? Yay suggestive optical illusions! (COED Magazine)

Kim Kardashian’s big ass gets slapped by a wave, but she doesn’t fall down. Way to drop the ball, Pacific Ocean. (The Grumpiest)

It’s a blonde-off! Emma Stone vs Olivia Wilde. (Popoholic)

Here are some Lego Star Wars pics that could pull the ears off a gundark. May the Fourth be with you! Yes, I’m about three days late, but you can go fuck yourself. (Caveman Circus)