Meet the Canadian Jenna Jameson. Nice tits, eh? (The Dirty)

Paris Hilton loves black people now, as demonstrated by this carefully staged photo. (Agent Bedhead)

Mad Men is about to get canceled! Good thing I don’t have cable then. (Celebitchy)

This won’t do anything to help those Elijah Wood gay rumors. (Seriously? OMG)

More of Brooklyn Decker’s double deckers in a bikini. You know, I give and I give and I give, but what do YOU ever do for me? (Moe Jackson)

Tiffani Amber Thiessen looks so much better as a brunette. (Use My Computer)

How crappy was Britney’s lipsynching during her Femme Fatale performance on Good Morning America today? (Evil Beet)

Jennifer Lopez burns Cheryl Cole. I’d burn Jennifer Lopez if anybody still cared about her. (Holy Moly!)

So Charlie Sheen was totally lying when he claimed all his shows were sold out. (Pop Crunch)

Katie Holmes wears a dress version of the pioneer’s long underwear to The Kennedys premiere. (Hollywood Rag)

Why you should NEVER superglue a tiny hat to your head. (Gawker)

Jose Canseco gets busted doing the ol’ twin switcheroo when he sends his brother to fight in a boxing match in his stead. (Bitten & Bound)

Ashley Greene looking mighty glamorous in the May issue of Glamour. (Anything Hollywood)

Jessica Simpson is all set to be a judge on X-Factor. (Right Celebrity)

Matthew McConaughey works a dapper suit on the cover of Esquire magazine. (popbytes)

Jessica Simpson is planning on eloping! Presumably so she won’t have to share any of the wedding cake with any guests. (Bricks and Stones)

Katy Perry’s mom hates her boobs. I hate Katy Perry. So we do have something in common! (Celebs)