Khloe Kardashian faces some awful genitals… and this time, they’re not her own. (Evil Beet)

Miranda July looks like a lesbian Colonel Sanders in an Andy Samberg wig. (Pop Candy)

Holly Hughes is the first hot babe of the year, and rightfully so. (Caveman Circus)

Because I bet your girlfriend never attempts to give a beer bottle a blowjob, much less in the middle of a crowded stadium while you film her. (Busted Coverage)

Victoria’s Secret model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley is approaching the scary skinny side of the scale. (Moe Jackson)

Despite years of internet reproach, Mischa Barton still continues to wear a bikini. Fascinating. (Hollywood Rag)

Rihanna rings in the new year with a nipple ring. I rang in my new year with a purity ring. Almost as cool. (Celeb Jihad)

Maria Menounos knows how to get her Greek on in a bikini. (Celeb Slam)

Saturday Night Live’s Jason Sudeikis manages to convince Olivia Wilde to have sex with him. I don’t understand it. (The Blemish)

Octomom Nadya Suleman gets dropped by her management team and her Facebook and Twitter are both deleted. That would be the cold hard thud of “your fifteen minutes is way past up.” (Bitten & Bound)

Even Mila Kunis‘ ass is artsy. I wish I could say the same about mine. (G Celeb)

“2011: A Rear Year in Perspective,” featuring Guess and Victoria’s Secret model Kate Upton. (COED Magazine)

Even more details in the Katy Perry/Russell Brand divorce. Apparently Katy is more Girls-Gone-Wild than housewife. (INF Daily)

“The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo’s” Rooney Mara continues to make friends in Hollywood by bad-mouthing every other role she’s ever had. (Celebitchy)