It’s going to be a glorious day. How do I know? Well, thanks to my recent breakfast regimen of Colon Blow, I am finally regular after binging on Polish sausage and deep-fried Twinkies, I’ve been able to continue to steal bandwidth from my cardboard box house outside my neighbor’s house, and Salma Hayek’s boobs are as massively spectacular as ever. That, to me, dear friends, is a pretty damn good day.
Leaving Madeo’s in West Hollywood last night: