The whore at the center of the Ashton Kutcher affair scandal never got that hush money she was after, so naturally she’s gone and sold their tales of ribaldry to the media. That sound you hear is actually Joslyn James and Michelle McGee slow golf clapping their approval. The Daily Mail says:

She said: “[Ashton and I] had sex twice. Everything felt natural. We were having a good time. He was good, but it wasn’t weird or perverted or creepy.

He had good endurance. We were up for a while. It was about two hours.’

She added that they had unprotected sex saying Kutcher didn’t use a condom during their encounter.

‘The last thing I remember him saying was he did a good job. We woke up and I wearing a robe. He opened it up and I was like “What are you doing?” He was like, “Just checking. Ok, I did good. You’re really pretty.’

Of course he didn’t use a condom. Why would he. It’s Vegas. Besides, it’s not like he can’t track her down if he needs to, so long as she still goes by the same stage name.