35-year-old singer Shakira announced today that she is pregnant with her first child. Insert your own “womb don’t lie” joke here. People magazine says:
“As some of you may know, [boyfriend] Gerard [Piqué] and I are very happy awaiting the arrival of our first baby! At this time we have decided to give priority to this unique moment in our lives and postpone all the promotional activities planned over the next few days,” she writes.
“This means I will not be able to be a part of the iHeartRadio Music Festival … I’d like to thank Clear Channel and my fans for their constant love and understanding. Big kiss!”
It’s a big year for Shakira, and not just because she’s pregnant — she’s also replacing Christina Aguilera as a judge on season four of The Voice, because a pregnant Shakira is still hotter than a fat Christina Aguilera any day of the week. When asked for comment, Christina reportedly said, “Ahmmm nom nom nom rrrrghlgh nom nom,” because she was still eating a bear claw and didn’t want to waste valuable chewing time talking.
Shakira in a geometric print dress being given the title of “Knight of the Order of Arts and Letters” by the French Minister of Culture Frederic Mitterand earlier this year. This dress from Joseph isn’t geometric, but when you’re doing short pleats, patterns aren’t your friend. Trust me on that one: