Reality star Spencer Pratt alerted the media today that he had been arrested at a Costa Rican airport for possessing an illegal firearm while on his spiritual path to syndication enlightenment. The Daily Mail says:

The eccentric 27-year-old was trying to leave the country when he was arrested for felony possession.

He was then taken to a local jail where he was booked and processed.

It was only after turning over the weapons and signing a confession with the DA that Pratt was released and allowed to leave Costa Rica.

And he claims it was all just an accident.

Spencer tells TMZ, ‘As part of my spiritual cleansing I’ve spent the last week living alone in the jungle, reflecting on my past transgressions, and working to become a better person. I had to live off the land, and hunt to survive. As I departed the country this morning to continue my spiritual journey, I mistakenly brought my hunting weapons to the airport. It was an honest mistake, and they sent me on my way.

On an unrelated note, I’m not allowed in the country anymore – but that’s because of the chicken incident.’

I don’t know what he was thinking bringing a cache of hunting weapons to the fucking airport. You can’t have more than 3.4 fluid ounces of shampoo in your bag or carry a bottle of soda onto a plane, oh, but sure, the crossbow’s cool. Just set it over there next to the propane tanks and the flamethrowers and the guy in the turban chanting “praise be Allah.”

Thrice-rehabbed “Tudors” star Jonathan Rhys Meyers got himself banned from a United Airlines flight last week after he pounded enough liquor in JFK airport lounge to become drunk and belligerent. Did I mention this was around seven in the morning? Radar Online says

The Irish actor was banned from flying United when he became increasingly drunk and disorderly early in the morning at New York’s JFK airport.

When airline workers noticed the actor drinking and getting out of control, they prevented him from boarding the flight to L.A.

Meyers, growing furious, flung the ‘N’ word. He had been drinking vodka and it was before 7 am. It is unclear if the actor was directing the word toward an individual or just spewing it without a specific target.

[Meyers] has a history of traveling misbehavior — in 2007, he was arrested at Dublin airport and charged with being drunk [and disorderly], and in June 2009, he was arrested after allegedly attacking a number of staff at a bar in Paris’ Charles de Gaulle airport.

I don’t condone the use of the “n-word.” But I do think it’s kinda funny when some redneck gets falling-down drunk and wants to start a fight but can’t remember the proper incendiary words, so he just starts bleating a stream of insults like a retard with Tourette’s and ends up calling a white guy with a combover the n-word. Even better if he yells, “And get your goddamn hands off my wife!” while he’s at it, even though his wife isn’t there because he isn’t fucking married and he’s the only one who doesn’t realize that he’s pissed his pants. Honest to God, I’ve witnessed both of these things one more than one occasion. Maybe it’s time I got some new friends.

You might feel like getting drunk at breakfast if you carried a man-purse, too:

PHOTO SOURCE: Pacific Coast News

Stupid is as stupid does, people. What’s the #1 thing you never, EVER, bring to the airport? An incendiary device! DING! DING! DING! But if you’re Johnny Knoxville douchebaggery comes naturally. MSNBC gives the details of what happened:
Johnny Knoxville, star of the “Jackass” TV show and movies, was detained Thursday at Los Angeles International Airport for allegedly possessing an inert hand grenade in a carry-on bag, an airport official said.

Knoxville, 38, of Malibu, was going through passenger security screening when a Transportation Security Administration officer saw the image of a hand grenade in his carry-on bag, said Nancy Castles of Los Angeles World Airports.

Airport Police and the Los Angeles Police Department Bomb Squad were called, and it was determined the grenade had no explosives or firing pin, she said.

Knoxville whose real name is John Philip Clapp, told Airport Police the hand grenade was a prop from one of his photo shoots and that he had forgotten it was in his bag, Castles said.

I would normally say I hoped he got a full cavity search, but then again, he’d probably actually enjoy it, then do it again so he could get it on video.

Out shopping last month at Saks Fifth Avenue: