Batman actor Christian Bale had assault charges filed against him yesterday while in London for the British premiere of The Dark Knight. But here’s the shocker: the charges were filed by his own mother and sister. According to The Sun

He is alleged to have lashed out on Sunday night at Park Lane’s Dorchester Hotel where he has a suite. Mum Jenny, 61, and sister Sharon, 40, who lives in Dorset, went to a police station in Hampshire yesterday to lodge the allegation. The matter was referred to the Met Police. Detectives… are expected to quiz the Wales-born actor today.

I don’t see what all the fuss is about. Christ, I’d pay fifty dollars American to get smacked around by Christian motherfucking Bale. A hundred if he kept the Batsuit on. His mother and sister should be thanking him for the privilege, not bitching to the cops like a couple of ingrate stepchildren. Pearls before swine, I tell ya. Stinging, hand-print-leaving pearls before swine. Some people just don’t know how lucky they are.

UPDATE: TMZ is reporting that Christian has been arrested and taken in for questioning.

The trailer for the new Batman flick “Dark Knight” has been leaked online, and as of 12:31 EST Warner Brothers hasn’t yanked it from the Daily Zoom, so knock yourselves out. It’s kinda hard to tell exactly what’s going on in the trailer — what with the no sound and bootleg quality and all — but my reporter’s instinct leads me to believe that a lot of shit is blowing up and that also, Batman has a pretty kick-ass bike. My instincts also indicate that Heath Ledger’s Joker must have been in the middle of spirited bout of “World of Warcraft” or maybe reading aloud some of the free verse from his journal when his mom forbade him from going to the Fall Out Boy concert that night. And thus is born one of the most notorious superhero villains in history. Rated PG-13 for violence, language, and overt gayness.