I’ve never been a fan of Hayden Panettiere. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her in anything, so I can’t comment on her acting skills. I don’t think she’s particularly beautiful, and she doesn’t have anything that really recommends herself to me. I just realized that I needed to see her play tennis in a bikini. That Hayden Panettiere, she’s really something, isn’t she?

Playing tennis (and shooting a few hoops with boyfriend Scotty McKnight in Hawaii:

This is the first really clear shot of the engagement ring Brad Pitt spent a year designing with jeweler Robert Procop for his new bride-to-be, Angelina Jolie. The Daily Mail says:

Procop said: ‘Brad had a specific vision for this ring. He wanted every aspect of it to be perfect. Brad was always heavily involved [in] overseeing every aspect of the design evolution, [insisting on a] diamond of the finest quality cut to an exact custom size and shape to suite Angelina’s hand.”

Experts estimate the ring cost around $250,000.

Wait, did you catch that? Angie’s ring only cost a quarter of a million dollars, but you’ll remember he spent HALF a million on the ring he designed for ex-wife Jennifer Aniston. Oh, you didn’t remember that? Yeah, me neither. Good thing Jen called up Us Magazine to remind them, then! Yahoo News says:

It looks like Pitt, 48, has gotten a bit more conservative when it comes down to the price tag. Back in 1999, Aniston’s ring, which she debuted during a Sting concert in NYC, was estimated to be worth around $500,000; jewelry expert Michael O’Connor quoted Jolie’s ring to be somewhere around $250,000.

This is probably the best day that Jennifer Aniston’s had since the first reviews of “The Tourist” came in. It’s the little victories in life that keep us from killing ourselves.

Kelly Brook in some new bikini pics because close-ups of engagement rings don’t make your pants feel funny:

Apparently Leighton Meester’s ass has the density and gravitational pull of dying star, because those bikini bottoms can’t escape her crack. Not that I’m complaining or anything.

In Rio with her new hippie boyfriend Aaron Himelstein:

Alec Baldwin was awarded a protective order against the 40-year-old Canadian actress accused of stalking and harassing him for the last six months after she attempted to enter his Manhattan home on Sunday. Genevieve Sabourin claims to have had a sexual relationship with Alec, and while he admits to having dinner with her on more than one occasion, he claims it was a “strictly professional” relationship. Which probably just means he paid her afterwards. Radar Online says:

Sabourin “said [she and Alex] had sex and she wanted to have his baby,” a source told the NY Post, adding Baldwin acknowledges having dinner with the Montreal native twice last year, but says he kept things “strictly professional” with no “physical relationship” between them.

A separate source told the paper Sabourin’s “claiming that she and Alec were lovers.’’

On March 31… Sabourin showed up at his Hamptons home. Days later, she trailed Baldwin at a Lincoln Center Q&A and was arrested Sunday after trying to access his Manhattan home via the doorman.

On April 4, Sabourin emailed Baldwin with the message, “I need to start my new life, with my new name… help me my newly [sic] husband, you! Please Alec come and pick me up now. I am less than 10 min away from you tonight. Say I do to me.’’

According to Sabourin’s iMDb page, she worked with Baldwin on the 2002 film The Adventures of Pluto Nash, where he had a small role while she worked in the film’s public relations department.

Sadly, the most shameful part of the story is that Alec Baldwin had a small role in “The Adventures of Pluto Nash.”

“Glee’s” Lea Michele in a bikini because she’s not middle-aged and laden with eye bags:

44-year-old Julia Roberts in a bikini isn’t bad, but then 44-year-old Julia Roberts in a bikini isn’t good, either. Welcome to the Switzerland of celebrity swimsuit pictures.

In Hawaii with her three kids Hazel, Phinnaeus and Henry (whose names are now etched on her body in the traditional tramp stamp fashion):

Don’t you hate it when you eat something and it all goes to your mons pubis? Ask Naomi Watts. Okay, it’s not that bad, I was just happy to find an opportunity to use the word mons pubis. It makes me feel so educated. I feel like I should be wearing a monacle and twirling my mustache.  I have neglected to wax it for quite a while.

In Barbados with the fam:

Hollywood has really stopped trying at this point and instead taken to crapping out remake after remake because special effects = better! Just ask George Lucas. Anyway, “Total Recall” and “The Blue Lagoon” are the latest eighties movies to be passed through the bowels of the industry, and I was all set to rant and rave against the bland corporate homogenization of iconic films, but then I saw that the new “Total Recall” had Kate Beckinsale. And new “Blue Lagoon” has that chick in the bikini up there. That’s when I realized — they had me at “tits.” Well-played, Hollywood!

Indiana Evans in Maui shooting the “Blue Lagoon” remake:

Welcome to nylon and spandex purgatory, or else this is part of some scared-straight program for wayward bikini fabrics. Either way, I’m done with cottage cheese for the next few weeks. Ugh.

Kim and Kourtney Kardashian in the Dominican Republic this weekend:

There are lots of bad ways to start your day. Looking at pictures of Miranda Kerr and Candice Swanepoel is not one of them. Suck it, Wheaties.

This Nicole Richie is too fat. This Nicole Richie is too thin. This Nicole Richie is just right. Hopefully this is the part of the story where the bears come back from their walk in the woods and find her in Baby Bear’s bed and maul her.

There’s only one reason for back-to-back Jersey Shore posts, and that reason is because I hate you. At least this post has more than just one boob in it.

There’s no better way to celebrate the first day of spring than by getting sprung, I always say. These pictures of Candice Swanepoel in the latest Victoria’s Secret swimsuit catalog ought to do the trick nicely!