Essence Magazine has their kinte cloth knickers in a wad because Angelina Jolie is slated to appear as Cleopatra. Says the Herald Sun,

The Egyptian queen was famously played by Elizabeth Taylor in 1963, but the proposed remake has sparked controversy over Jolie’s suitability for the role.

Scott Rudin, who is producing the film, has said that Jolie has “the perfect look” for the Queen who lured Marc Anthony to her side, but his words have angered the African American community.

Essence Magazine has been quoted asking, “Another White Actress to Play Cleopatra?”

“I don’t care how full Angelina Jolie’s lips are, how many African children she adopts, or how bronzed her skin will become for the film, I firmly believe this role should have gone to a black woman.”

“Were Vanessa Williams, Halle Berry and Thandie Newton unavailable for auditions that day?”

Steven Soderberg, director of Ocean’s 11, is set to direct the film, with Jolie’s partner Brad Pitt among the mentions to play the Queen’s lover Marc Anthony.

I would totally agree with them, except for that little fact that Cleopatra was part of the Ptolemaic Dynasty, who were Greek. Now, if they really want to be authentic, they’d have a hairy pregnant Cleopatra cooking and cleaning while the men have sex with each other. What? I’m just trying to be authentic, yo.

In Venice on the set of The Tourist:

This is one of Hugh Hefner’s many ex-hookers girlfriends Karissa Shannon, out with her new boyfriend. Well, I don’t think there could be more of a contrast between the two. One is ancient, white, saggy all over, relies on a pill to be able to copulate, which is probably like having sex with a bag of cottage cheese, while the other is young, black, and probably has a penis the size of Hef’s bruised-old-man-skinned forearm. I’d say it’s a step up.

Actor Rupert Everett recently voiced his opinion on the death of Michael Jackson in a spectacular stream of verbal diarrhea. He told the Daily Mirror

“[Michael Jackson] looked like a character from Shrek. We all watched as he changed from black to white. He was living performance art. I think it was fortuitous that he died. He was a freak.”

Michael Jackson was “a freak?” Well, there’s a case of the surgically-disfigured pot calling the kettle black! But not too black. He continued:

“We have Michael Jackson, a black man who has gone white, and we have President Barack Obama, who is a half-white man gone black. It’s absolutely fascinating to watch.”

Then he added, “Ooh, ooh — I almost forgot — what’s black and white and dead all over? Michael Jackson! Ha ha! Get it?” before kicking his way through a crowd of paraplegic children and blind puppies.

Speaking of blind puppies, cute pictures of a dog named Bonnie who serves as a seeing eye dog for a blind dog named Clyde: