Josh Brolin should thank his lucky stars that he escaped the evil clutches of Scientology. He’s revealed that he had a close encounter with Scientology, John Travolta, Marlon Brando, and a blow job. Okay, I made that last part up, but it’s really not a stretch. Says Digital Spy,

Josh Brolin has described Scientology as “f**king bizarre”.

The actor admitted his brief experience with the religion’s “auditing” treatment – which he insisted took place during “a real moment of desperation” in his life – and also recalled an incident in which he witnessed John Travolta “practising Scientology” on Marlon Brando.

“I watched this process going on – it was very physical. I was thinking, ‘This is really f**king bizarre!’” he recalled to The New Yorker.

“Then, after ten minutes, Brando opens his eyes and says, ‘That really helped. I actually feel different!’”

Brolin went on to say that he does not understand Scientology’s appeal to its famous members such as Travolta and Tom Cruise, adding: “Each has a good head on his shoulders, they make great business decisions, they seem to have wonderful families. Is that because they were helped by Scientology?”

Reps for Travolta have denied the incident with Brando.

C’mon, read between the lines, people. Closet gay John Travolta performing some “very physical” act on Brando, who’s got that well-known fellatio pic that’s been floating around for years? Yeah. I bet that really helped.

Josh Brolin, along with some Malin Akerman thrown in for good measure at the Bvlgari Private Event Honoring Simon Fuller And Paul Haggis To Benefit Save The Children And Artists For Peace And Justice, Which Has Got to be the Longest Title for Any Benefit:

Yet again RadarOnline has another audio tape of Mel Gibson ranting and raving like the white devil that he is.  The thing that gets me though, is that from the transcript of the tape, it sure as hell sounds like Oksana is still living with the freak. And is still willing to have sex with him.  From RadarOnline:

It’s a twisted combination of misogynistic emotional violence and rage combined with a dark threat of physical harm as Gibson rages that Oksana fell asleep before they could go into the Jacuzzi together and have sex.

Gibson screams: “I deserve to be blown first! Before the f*cking Jacuzzi! Ok, I’ll burn the goddamn house up, but blow me first! How dare you!??!”

At one point he screams at Oksana: “I should’ve woken you up and said f*cking blow me bitch! I should’ve f*ckin’ woken you up and said blow me! You would’ve liked that better, yeah? But you need the goddamn sleep!”

Oksana protests that she waited for him the night,  before but fell asleep, and that sends Mel into a new rage.

“Waited and waited,” Mel bellows. “What, two and a half f*cking minutes!? You’re f*cking snoring. Don’t you dare.”

Mel also admits during the conversation that he’s seeing a therapist and yells at Oksana: “You wanted the number of my therapist? Don’t you ever speak to him! Find your own goddamn therapist! Because you’ve got problems more than me!”

Toward the end of the tape Mel tells the Russian-born Oksana: “You gotta push my f*cking buttons. And it’s not going to work with us! It’s not! I can’t get like this anymore!

“And you know you’re doing it and you’re a liar and you’re dishonest and you’re f *cked up! So you stay the f *ck away from me! Take care of your f *cking son and I better have my daughter!”

If you listen to the recording, you can practically see the veins bulging out of his forehead and his eyes popping out like Mr. DiMartino from Daria. But if Oksana wants to be stupid and hang around for Mel to kill her, that’s her choice. But she’s got kids in the situation, which makes her a sick fuck for putting them in danger. She gets no sympathy from me.

Pictures of Hannah Montana star Miley Cyrus performing oral sex on an unidentified wiener are tearing up the interwebs today (click header for an extremely edited version of the photo — she’s underage, and experience has taught me that “pedophile” is a hard label to shake). Some are claiming the pictures have been photoshopped using old photographs (see photos of Miley in a similar position here), while others are claiming that they are 100% real-deal Miley sausage gobbling. Personally, I’m of the persuasion that the photo is a fake. Mostly because there’s no way in hell Nick Jonas actually has a penis. Show me something with a lot less testicle and little more beef curtain the next time around and maybe I’ll buy it.

Miley kissing co-star Liam Hemsworth while filming “The Last Song in Savannah”: