Now it’s time to play, “Who’s the Bigger Douche?”. Everyone loves to hate paparazzi, so when one gets pitted against a creepily grinning Mel Gibson, it’s hard to know who to root for. Mel stops his car, gets out, and comes walking up to the pap’s car recording video with his phone. Mel and the pap go back and forth with each other, spouting gems like, “You got a lot of dialogue, don’t you?” “Oh I got everything up my sleeve, buddy, and I have a short-sleeve shirt on.” Zing! They stop just short of saying, “I know you are, but what am I?” It couldn’t get any gayer if both of them pulled out their penises and had a sword fight. Which, by the way Mel protests so loudly against gays, he might actually enjoy.
“Whaa are you looking at? Habn’t you seen a sloppy drunk b’fore? I’m tellin’ you occifer, that red light jus’ jumped outta nowhere. What? You want a license? How ’bout a nice CD instead? No? Oh.
Driving in St. Tropez with friends, who were stopped after running a red. Tara tried to give the cop a CD for some reason. Of course they got off with a warning.
Paris Hilton made a huge assy spectacle of herself in L.A. yesterday by driving around in a bright pink Bentley Continental GT. Volkswagen, have you no shame? The Daily Mail says
The 27-year-old socialite has bought the $200,000 vehicle as a Christmas present for herself. The vehicle was sprayed a specific shade of cherry blossom pink, which was complimented by pink sheetmetal, grille, hubcaps and most of the interior.
Explaining her reason for customizing her car pink, Hilton said: ‘I love pink so I met up with [a Bentley executive] and brought him this pink clock from the Disney store and got him to make this exact color and we just designed it all together.’
Although the car boasts a 37 inch front headroom and full floor console with covered storage box, it’s still nowhere near as roomy as Paris Hilton’s actual vagina. For that, Consumer Reports recommends something like a Humvee or maybe one of those shipping freighters that carry truck trailers. God knows you wouldn’t want your penis inadvertently touching the sides!
With new BFF Brittany Flickinger in L.A. yesterday:
