Chris Martin is Cheating on Gwyneth with Kate Bosworth

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Coldplay frontman Chris Martin is reportedly cheating on wife Gwyneth Paltrow with actress Kate Bosworth. Ooh, it’s about to get all kinds of Dynasty in here! According to Star Magazine

[Everyone is talking] about Chris Martin’s hot make-out session with a beautiful blonde who wasn’t Gwyneth Paltrow. In fact, the Brit singer was locking lips with his better half’s good friend, Kate Bosworth!

“I couldn’t believe my eyes,” an eyewitness [says]. “There was Chris totally making out with Kate in front of other people. At first I thought it might be Gwyneth, but when she came up for air, it was clear the woman was Kate!”

So Chris has a thing for pale, anemic-loooking blonds with bird necks, huh? I guess it’s the closest thing to making love to himself without actually having to use his own fist.

Kate showing nips in Tank magazine:

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Justin Timberlake and Rihanna Are Secretly Dating

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Justin Timberlake’s gone puss-swapping — he’s supposedly dumping girlfriend of three years Jessica Biel for singer Rihanna. Star Magazine says

After a hot grinding session at 1Oak’s MTV Video Music Awards bash in NYC, RiRi and JT moved to her hotel room, where they had a steamy, private after party! “Rihanna and Justin have been talking and texting on the phone nonstop since the VMAs,” said a source.

“Then at [the studio where the two are working on Rihanna’s new album], Justin was joking about strippers. He said she needed to entertain him like that. So Rihanna gave him an impromptu lap dance!”

Justin has made it clear he is 100 percent into Rihanna, and she equally feels the magnetic attraction, says a source. “She is a total tease and loves flirting with him. She digs him and wants to date him too!”

Well, as long as he doesn’t bash her face in or bite her, he’s already doing better the last guy. That’s the great thing about battered women. They set the bar so low!

Rihanna in Venice:

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John Mayer Broke Up Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo

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Jessica Simpson’s ill-advised “Barbie and Ken” themed birthday party never came to fruition this past weekend because boyfriend Tony Romo found texts on her phone from ex John Mayer. According to Radar Online

“[Tony and Jessica] were hanging out and he picked up her phone and she got defensive about it,” the source revealed. “Tony found messages from John and went ballistic.”

While the couple has had their fair share of rocky patches during their relationship, the idea of Simpson possibly cheating with Mayer was the straw that broke the camel’s back: “Tony dumped her right then. He walked out and that was it.”

Although she gets dumped more often than Jennifer Aniston, brave little Jess hasn’t given up on love just yet. She tweeted

“Barbie party didn’t happen, but I turned 29 and feel like I am on top of the world yelling, ‘I love getting older! Everyone needs to know that hope floats … grab the strings and pull it back to you.”

And if that doesn’t work, put it in a chokehold and smother it with Rocky Road ice cream. You can’t spell “desperate” without “ate,” you know!

Back when she was still hot:

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Timberlake is Cheating on Jessica Biel, According to Lohan

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Rumors of infidelity have plagued Justin Timberlake for months now, and being spotted sucking face with someone other than Jessica Biel at a New York nightclub by a Twittering Lindsay Lohan isn’t going to help matters. Nine MSN says

Celebrity blogger Poison Ivy first spotted JT and [an] unknown girl, reporting on their site: “Spotted a very intoxicated JT at Avenue nightclub in New York’s Chelsea district Monday night, kissing, holding hands and canoodling with an unknown brunette in a white hat.”

Next thing you know, Lindsay Lohan, [who] just happened to be at the same nightclub, was on the case! She posted a pic of the place on her Twitter with the caption, “So dark- where’s jb cheater?”

Let’s not jump to conclusions here. For all we know, that “JB” stands for Jim Beam. It is Lindsay Lohan we’re talking about, you know.

Jessica arriving at Letterman last month:

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Jon and Kate Plus 8 Scandal Thickens

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Much like the mucus that coagulates in the cervical canal during the initial stages of pregnancy, the scandal surrounding “Jon and Kate Plus 8’s” Jon Gosselin’s three-month affair with school teacher Deanna Hummel continues to thicken. After Deanna’s brother Jason went on record earlier this week to confirm Jon’s multiple trips to the Pennsylvania home he shares with Deanna, his sister responded by telling the press Jason was an unemployed former drug addict and a liar. Us Weekly says

As for Deanna’s accusations against her brother for being “very shady” and “having no job” and a “criminal background,” Jason Hummel — a full-time student at Reading Area Community College - was candid about his history. “I have a bad past and I’m not proud of it,” he told the magazine. “I was selling drugs. I’m on probation. When I made my mistake, I was the same age as my sister is now, making her mistake. Hopefully she can learn from it.”

Meanwhile…

A security guard at a Pennsylvania motel has come forth, telling RadarOnline.com that he also saw Jon kiss a woman who fits the description of Deanna at Legends Lounge on April 19. (Jon has denied kissing Deanna at the club. He also denied that he wasn’t wearing his wedding ring, even though photos clearly show him with no band on his left hand.)

Perhaps even more shocking in all of this is the revelation that people actually watch this show. I had honestly never heard of it until this week. I figured the only people who tuned in to “Jon and Kate Plus 8″ were stay-at-home moms and guys who stumbled across it thinking was some kind of gangbang porno.

Madonna’s New Boyfriend is Already Cheating

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Perhaps 50-year old poon loses its luster after a couple of pokes, because Madonna’s new boyfriend Jesus Luz was caught working a lingerie model over in Rio. The Sun says

Brazilian Jesus, 22, was seen tenderly clasping lingerie model Luciana Costa as they swayed to the music in his home city. Jesus held 31-year-old Luciana close and, [according to an eyewitness, "They] danced together very close lots of times. He whispered things in her ear, grabbed her hand, put his hand around her waist. He’d had a little to drink and it seemed clear he was after something.” Early the next day the pair were snapped as they ventured out for a Sunday stroll.

Madonna, 50, was nowhere in sight when Jesus arrived at the bash on Saturday night.

Ooh, everybody knows you don’t cross someone like Madonna. Not unless you want her to summon a winter that lasts for a thousand years, that is. You’d have better chances bare-knuckling a grizzly high on PCP.

At the Valentino movie premiere after-party in NY:

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Sarah Jessica Parker’s Moving Out!

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Hi guys it’s Sonya again.  Abby’s currently occupied battling her computer, which at 12:30 EST, became self-aware. That Trojan was one mean sucker!

Star Magazine Star told you first that Sarah Jessica Parker’s husband, Matthew Broderick, was cheating on her with a younger woman. Now they’re reporting that the Sex and the City star is house-hunting–solo!

In the Jan. 19 issue of Star — on sale now! — we report that while Sarah thought she could make it work with her straying mate, she recently visited a midtown real estate broker to help her find her own place.

“The time has come when she realizes it just isn’t worth it,” a friend of the couple tells Star. “Sarah Jessica is determined to get her own place and bring down the curtain on her marriage.”

Adds another insider: “Sarah’s not stupid. She knows exactly what’s going on. For a while it was easier for her to stay than go through a harsh divorce. They’re essentially living separate lives.”

Now that the holidays are over, the actress is revisiting her exit strategy, which takes into careful consideration the couple’s 6-year-old son, James Wilkie — just about the only thing holding the pair together.

“They spent the holidays with him, pretending to be happy,” says another source. “SJP is a great actress when she has to be!”

Well, I’m glad that Sarah finally got the motivation she needed to finally become a great actress. I loved her in Seabicuit, but when all you do is wear a saddle and run around a racetrack, there’s not opportunity to stretch those acting chops.

The little filly in her winter coat, dropping off James Wilkie at school:

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Cindy McCain is Having an Affair

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Former Presidential hopeful John McCain not only lost the election, but it appears he also lost his wife in the process. The The National Enquirer reports

An eyewitness says he snapped photos as the [senator's] wife romantically kissed a long-haired man who resembles “a washed-up ’80s rock musician.” The pair have been seen at concerts and sporting events around Phoenix acting very lovey-dovey.

The photos were snapped April 1, 2006 when Cindy and her companion attended the Tempe Music Festival. The photos are somewhat grainy, but the insider says they depict Senator John McCain’s wife, who was greeted by pals at the event as “Cindy.”

“Cindy had her hand on his shoulder and was kissing him passionately on his lips,” the photog [said]. A second witness spotted Cindy and her “mystery man” at a Moody Blues concert “passionately kissing and hugging.”

It’s not that difficult to believe the accusations considering the 18-year age difference between John, 72 and Cindy, 54. That’s nearly two decades between them. Sure, he might have seven houses and the fascist loyalty of religious conservatives nationwide, but the fact is he’s still a flabby septuagenarian with old man balls. Fact. No amount of money will ever change that. The only reason a woman would voluntarily have sex with a guy that old is because she was banking on him being dead within the next three months, giving her just enough time to establish herself in the last will and testament while minimizing the number of times she actually has to suffer through intercourse with him. Some people call it “prostitution;” I prefer to call it “my ticket out of this dump.” Call me, Senator!

Matthew Broderick Cheated on Sarah Jessica!

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Sarah Jessica Parker might have metaphorically been put out to pasture by her cheating cad of a husband! According to Star Magazine

While the beloved actress was frantically searching for hubby Matthew Broderick one night earlier this year, he was having sex in the city with a gorgeous redhead half his age.

After meeting in a bar, Matthew began text messaging the 25-year-old youth counselor. Soon after, they began seeing each other and things got passionate quickly when they met at the Manhattan townhouse of a showbiz friend.

I don’t buy it. Not for a second. Not because I believe in the sanctity of their marriage or anything lame like that. It’s because they didn’t once mention the redhead having a penis or smelling like Endure® Sweat Resistant Fly Spray for Horses and sawdust shavings.

SJP with Mr. Big in Vogue Magazine:

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