43-year-old Elizabeth Hurley worked some seriously masochistic-looking cleavage at an event at the Tower of London yesterday. You can almost see the carotid artery in her neck bulging from the all pressure. I’ll give her props, though — it’s a damn impressive bust line. I think the only time my tits ever even came close to looking like that, there was a straight-jacket involved. And also a couple of orderlies and a syringe full of Chlorpromazine and a cop with a taser and a K-9 unit. But I doubt that’s the secret behind Elizabeth Hurley’s cleavage. She probably just has a red carpet stylist or something.

Latina bombshell Salma Hayek has landed a recurring role on the NBC sitcom “30 Rock” as Alec Baldwin’s character’s new love interest. I can think of two very good reasons she scored a “recurring role” on the show. Two massive, supple, heaving reasons. A) Her impressive command of the English language, and B) the depth and range her “Sinbad Show” experience brings to the table. Not since Charro has such a wealth of talent and English mastery been present in one amazing woman!

Shooting 30 Rock in Brooklyn on Saturday: