I’m guessing this is one of those times that Lady Gaga indulged in doing a little coke. Or more like, a shitload of it. She surprised and thrilled the queens in her audience by doing a little crowd surfing this weekend. Says Popeater,

Lady Gaga returned to Lollapalooza this past weekend for the first time since 2007, and it’s safe to say the crowd was just a bit bigger this time around. Gaga went from playing a humble singer-songwriter set on a side stage to opening the festival, bringing in a “massive” special stage with her that event founder and Jane’s Addiction frontman Perry Ferrell admittedly invested hundreds of thousands of dollars into. “Only Lady Gaga could step in and say ‘I’m a headliner,’” Ferrell told Britain’s Daily Star.

Gaga may have upgraded but she certainly hasn’t lost her rock-and-roll spirit. After her own extravagant set, Gaga surprised Semi Precious Weapons fans by joining the band on-stage during their performance and causing a near riot. Wearing little more than fishnet stockings and strategic golden pasties, Gaga rocked out on drums before stage diving into the unsuspecting crowd and, to the dismay of her bodyguard, crowd surfing around for a bit.

She looks like a retarded Parkinson’s patient having a seizure beating that drum. The video clip didn’t go the way I was hoping it would. I was hoping that the crowd would get so excited they’d converge on her and strip her down to the bone like the dung beetles did in The Mummy. She is a big pile of shit, after all. Why can’t I get my way?

Beyonce did a little stage-diving in the crowd Monday night at London’s O2 arena as she wrapped up her hit song Halo in a free concert for her fans. What the video doesn’t show is the aftermath of hundreds of people’s spines simultaneously telescoping and discs herniating and lumbars spasming before they collapsed to the floor. I bet it looked just like Moses parting the Red Sea, only with more involuntary loss of bowel control and clutching of the lower back.