The estranged husband of “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” star Taylor Armstrong was found dead of an apparent suicide last night. So far, it doesn’t look like a case of erotic asphyxiation gone wrong, but you never know with some of these perverts. TMZ says:

Sources say Russell Armstrong hanged himself. He was found hanging in his bedroom on Mulholland Drive.

L.A. City Fire Department arrived at his home and pronounced him dead at 8:16 PM Monday.

Authorities have not found a suicide note. He was 47 years old.

Russell Armstrong just got divorced for the second time, was bankrupt, had a previous felony conviction for tax evasion and routinely beat every woman he bedded. I think the real question here is why he hadn’t committed suicide sooner.

It’s being suggested in several UK papers today that Amy Winehouse’s untimely death this weekend was not due to overdose or alcohol poisoning, but because she stopped drinking. No, really. The Daily Mail says:

It is thought that Amy had been told to cut down on her drinking gradually, but her cold turkey approach to quitting the booze gave her frail body a shock it couldn’t handle.

A source close to the family told the paper: ‘Abstinence gave her body such a fright they thought it was eventually the cause of her death.’

Amy’s father Mitch said that Amy had beaten her battle with drink and drugs and she hadn’t drunk for three weeks and hadn’t touched drugs for years.

Mitch told mourners: ‘Three years ago, Amy conquered her drug dependency, the doctors said it was impossible but she really did it. She was trying hard to deal with her drinking and had just completed three weeks of abstinence.’

However it has been claimed that the singer was drinking gin and red bull drinks at the Roundhouse in Camden three days before her death.

The only way her death would be a tragedy instead of a stupid accident is if she actually died from not drinking. That’s the absolute LAST thing anybody would suspect. Look, I appreciate irony as much as the next girl, but I don’t think God has that sick a sense of humor.

Some celebrities who have died from excessive drug and alcohol abuse could have been saved if only they took drug and alcohol addiction counseling seriously.

Amy and her breast implants on vacation earlier this year:

PHOTO SOURCE: Fame Pictures

“Two and a Half Men’s” Charlie Sheen-less season premiere will kick off in September with Alan and Jake acknowledging his character Charlie Harper’s untimely death. TMZ says:

Producers have been kicking around scenarios, which include Charlie driving a car over a cliff.

As for how Ashton Kutcher enters the picture, there’s been talk that he buys Charlie’s house after Charlie kicks the bucket.

Sources connected [say] Chuck Lorre’s plan is to make sure Charlie Sheen can NEVER come back on the show.

I’m not sure how Chuck Lorre thinks killing off Charlie Harper will make it so Sheen can never return to the show, unless he’s never heard of dream sequences, functional magic, advanced alien races with life-restoring powers, alternate dimensions, applied phlebotinum, deus ex machinas or Jesus. See “Dallas,” “Star Trek: Voyager,” “Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” “Doctor Who,” “Heroes,” “Stargate SG-1,” “Smallville,” “24,” “The X-Files,” every soap opera ever known to man and the Bible for details.

Sad news today for fans of Columbo star Peter Falk–he passed away last night at his home in Beverly Hills. Says Us Weekly,

The Emmy-winning actor was 83. Although family members declined to discuss the cause of death, Falk had been suffering from Alzheimer’s disease and dementia for many years, his adopted daughter Catherine Falk said.

Back in 2009, a judge settled a dispute between Catherine and Falk’s wife, Shera, over conservatorship of the ailing actor.

Falk’s biggest claim to fame was his role as a wry, tough-talking TV detective in Colombo, for which he won four Emmys; he was also nominated for numerous Oscars for his film work.

Falk is survived by Shera (his wife of over 30 years) and daughters Catherine and Jackie, whom he adopted with first wife Alyce Mayo.

I wasn’t around when Columbo was being produced, but I always remember him from his role of Fred Savage’s grandfather in one of the greatest comedy movies ever, The Princess Bride. Rest in peace, Mr. Falk.

Jackass star Ryan Dunn was reportedly three sheets to the wind and going 100 miles an hour when he slammed his Porsche into a tree early Monday morning, killing himself and his passenger instantly. People Magazine says:

A few hours before his accident, Dunn had three Miller Lites and three “girly shots” at a bar close to where he died in Pennsylvania.

One bar patron tells the site that Dunn was “wasted.”

Additionally, while the TV personality and his pals were drinking, the activities were posted in a photo that has since been taken down from Dunn’s Twitter page.

After news of Dunn’s death became public, legendary film critic Roger Ebert tweeted, “‘Jackass’ star Ryan Dunn, RIP. His Porsche flew through 40 yards of trees. Friends don’t let Jackasses drink and drive.” Naturally, blogger Perez Hilton — who is well-known for his tact and sense of decorum — couldn’t let that one go without making it about himself. Radar Online says:

In response [to Ebert's tweet], blogger Perez Hilton wrote, “Everyone makes mistake, and this is somebody’s son. Too soon, Roger.”

And Dunn’s Jackass co-star Bam Margera [also tweeted]: “I just lost my best friend, I have been crying hysterical for a full day and piece of shit roger ebert has the gall to put in his 2 cents about a jackass drunk driving and his is one, fuck you! Millions of people are crying right now, shut your fat fucking mouth!”

“Shut your fat fucking mouth?” How exactly is he gonna do that, considering he had half of his jaw removed after being diagnosed with papillary thyroid cancer and has to use a feeding tube to eat? The difference here is that Roger Ebert didn’t lose half his face because he chose to pound purple hooter shooters and then drive it into a tree. He got cancer. There’s your “too soon,” jackass.

UPDATE: Turns out he was going 130 miles an hour when he crashed. Hard to believe that someone who starred in “Jackass” would ever do something so stupid and reckless.

This is all that was left of his Porsche 911 GT3:

Sad news this morning — Airplane and Naked Gun star Leslie Nielsen passed away yesterday in Florida at the age of 84. Us Magazine says:

He passed away Sunday at a hospital near his home in Ft. Lauderdale, where he was being treated for pneumonia.

“We are sadden by the passing of beloved actor Leslie Nielsen, probably best remembered as Lt. Frank Drebin in The Naked Gun series of pictures, but who enjoyed a more than 60-year career in motion pictures and television,” read a statement.

He might be gone, but I know I never pull out a rubber without thinking of Lt. Frank Drebin’s full-body condom scene from the original Naked Gun. In fact, why don’t we revisit it for old times’ sake? May your love of keeping chlamydia at bay during drunken one-night stands keep his spirit alive forever!

Anna Nicole Smith’s lawyer-turned-boyfriend Howard K. Stern was found guilty of two counts of conspiracy yesterday for his role in illegally obtaining the prescription meds that ultimately killed her. People Magazine says:

Stern was convicted of a count of conspiring to prescribe prescription drugs using fraudulent means and a count of conspiring to furnish prescription drugs to an addict.

He was acquitted of seven other charges, including another conspiracy charge and charges of unlawfully prescribing a controlled substance and obtaining a prescription for an opiate using false information.

[Smith's psychiatrist Khristine] Eroshevich was convicted of four charges, including the same two conspiracy charges that Stern was convicted of, as well as two counts of obtaining a prescription for opiates using a false name.

Each of them face three or more years in prison at their Jan. 6 sentencing, says a spokeswoman for the DA’s office.

I bet you were just as shocked as I was when you read this. Anna Nicole Smith had a psychiatrist all those years? Yet she never spent any time in a straight jacket or locked in a room with padded walls or shaved down and covered with electrodes. My therapist must be doing it all kinds of wrong, then.

A 2006 legal document has been revealed in which Gary Coleman states he did NOT want to be taken off life support in the event he were ever in a coma. Coleman, you’ll remember, died when ex-wife Shannon Price took him off life support after he fell into a coma. Um… whoopsie. Radar Online says

The Utah Valley Regional Medical Centre [is] investigating the emergence of a new document [in which] Coleman specifically directed that he did not want anyone to pull the plug on his life support if he was ever in that situation.

In a 2006 document, Coleman checked a box titled “Choice to Prolong Life” which states, “I want my life to be prolonged as long as possible within the limits of generally accepted health care standards.”

The other option Coleman had — “Choice Not to Prolong Life” — was left unchecked.

Also checked on the document were the boxes “I Want to Be Taken Seriously” and “No One is to Refer to Me as ‘Webster’ or Use the Phrase ‘Whachu Talkin Bout Willis’ in My Presence.’” God only knows how many of this poor man’s wishes have been so wrongfully disregarded by the staff of the Utah Valley Regional Medical Centre and the public at large.

EDITOR’S NOTE: Yes, that’s Jenny McCarthy in a bikini instead of Gary Coleman, because Gary Coleman looked like this when he died.

Photos of Gary Coleman unconscious in the hospital in the hours before his death have already been sold to the highest bidder by his ex-wife Shannon Price (there’s still one photo of him dead that she’s currently shopping to the tabloids), and she’s wasted no time arranging interviews and tours of their home in exchange for cash. Radar Online says

Shannon shot a video interview within 24 hours of his death and cashed in on that. That two-hour interview was sold off in parts.

She then immediately shopped another interview, asking for up to $50,000. At the same time, she was in line to profit from the sale of a last video interview with Gary.

[But] Price says she is struggling financially [and] doesn’t know how she’s going to survive, even going so far as to make a plea to fans to send money… to pay for Coleman’s funeral.

She might have pocketed a hundred grand for those interviews, but she doesn’t have the money for a funeral because she needs to hang on to every dime she manages to wring from Coleman’s memory, because the hand-written addendum to his will giving her control of the estate isn’t going to hold up in court. Radar Online adds:

Gary Coleman’s new will [left] everything to his ex wife Shannon Price. The hand-written codicil to the 1999 will [which named his ex manager Dion Mial as executor of his estate] was written and signed by Gary Coleman in 2007.

But under Utah law, the codicil is invalid because Price and Coleman divorced.

“It is treated as having been revoked when a divorce occurs after it was written,” [Mial's attorney] said. “If they had remarried then the codicil would again be valid.”

Price told Good Morning America on Monday that the couple planned to remarry. But they didn’t. [As such], Utah law will treat the new document from the Diff’rent Strokes star as “null and void,” [making] the 1999 will is the valid one.

Fortunately, she still has a couple of the teeth she extracted from Gary’s skull right after they pulled the plug that she could sell on eBay. That ought to more than cover the embalming fees and her one-way ticket to hell.

I don’t know what the heck is going on.  The second to last Golden Girl, Rue McClanahan has died.  It’s like Death is on a rampage in the celebrity world. Dear Death: How about knocking off someone who really needs to go? Can you please make a stop at Speidi’s place? Pretty please? Kthanxbye! People Magazine gives the details.

Golden Girl Rue McClanahan has died at the age of 76.

“She passed away at 1 a.m. this morning,” her manager, Barbara Lawrence, tells PEOPLE. “She had a massive stroke.”

McClanahan, who played man-happy Blanche Devereaux on the still-popular ’80s sitcom Golden Girls, had suffered a minor stroke earlier this year while recovering from bypass surgery. Lawrence adds that at the time of her death Thursday, McClanahan “had her family with her. She went in peace.”

Rest in peace, Blanche! If you don’t automatically get into heaven, I’m sure you can work something out with St. Peter! *nudge, nudge, wink, wink*

Now, this is a bit odd. When I heard that Gary Coleman had fallen and suffered a head injury, I figured he was doing something active, like bunjee jumping from a barstool or something. No, he was making his live-in ex-wife a sammich when he fell, and bitch doesn’t even want to help him. Says nj.com,

Gary Coleman’s blood was everywhere, according to the frantic 911 call placed after the former star’s fall last Wednesday by Shannon Price (who, it turns out, was divorced from the former “Diff’rent Strokes” star). She told operators to hurry because “I can’t deal.”

“I had my husband go make me some food downstairs, he just got home and I heard this big bang,” Price says in the call. “His head is bloody. There’s blood all over the floor. Send someone quick because I don’t know if he’s going to, like, be alive.”
Coleman had returned from a grueling dialysis treatment for his congenital kidney disease and was considerably weakened. Though he was at least semi-conscious during the 911 call, he later lapsed into a coma and was taken off life support on Friday morning.
Meanwhile, People.com reports that Price represented herself as Coleman’s wife to emergency responders and hospital personnel, but she was actually divorced from Coleman since 2008. But whether they were married or not, Coleman had completed an advance health care directive that gave Price permission to make medical decisions on his behalf, according to the hospital in which he died, so it appears she’s in the clear to have taken him off life support.
Price’s lawyer, Shelia Erickson, tells People that she’s not sure whether Price and Coleman ever remarried, but, “They needed each other and loved each other. They wanted to work through their problems.”

Check out the 911 call. The really sick part is how Shannon Price acted during the emergency. The poor guy is lying on the floor, bleeding, “bubbling at the mouth”, and she “can’t deal” because she doesn’t want to get stressed out have a seizure. It’s kind of like, sorry dude, your head is bleeding but you’re going to have to figure it out. What a bitch. I hope his short little ghost comes back to haunt her.

The official results of Corey Haim’s autopsy have not been made public, but his mother claims it was actually pulmonary congestion and heart problems that killed him, not an overdose. According to People Magazine

Judy Haim says the coroner called her to disclose the actor suffered pulmonary congestion. [The] autopsy also found he had an enlarged heart along with the water in the lungs.

What role those factors played, if any, in Haim’s death isn’t known. L.A. Coroner Chief Craig Harvey notes, “There is no final cause of death at this time.”

Shortly before his death Wednesday at age 38, Haim complained of flu-like symptoms and had a high fever. The actor had long suffered from heart problems.

And God knows he was doing all he could to combat his flu-like symptoms — smoking crack five times a day instead of just three, and washing down his Xanax and Percocet with a bottle of vodka every six hours as directed. I guess it’s just one of those medical mysteries that will never really be solved. Damn you, science, for failing us once again!