Sep 21, 2011
R.E.M. announced yesterday that they were going their separate ways after over thirty years together. Front man Michael Stipe wrote on their official website:
“A wise man once said ‘the skill in attending a party is knowing when it’s time to leave.’ We built something extraordinary together. We did this thing. And now we’re going to walk away from it.
I hope our fans realize this wasn’t an easy decision; but all things must end, and we wanted to do it right, to do it our way.
We have to thank all the people who helped us be R.E.M. for these 31 years; our deepest gratitude to those who allowed us to do this. It’s been amazing.”
And he shot down any rumors of dissension within the band, adding:
“We have always been a band in the truest sense of the word. Brothers who truly love and respect each other. We feel kind of like pioneers in this — there’s no disharmony here, no falling-outs, no lawyers squaring off. We’ve made this decision together, amicably and with each other’s best interests at heart.”
And to prove there were no hard feelings, Michael Stipe promptly unleashed his (NSFW) wiener and riotous mane of pubic hair on the internet. Makes perfect sense, really. We just broke up, so here’s my dick. You’d be surprised how many of my relationships have ended with that very phrase.
Jun 3, 2011
With all the naked “Not Blake Lively” we’ve had here lately, I thought it was time for a little change of pace. Something along the lines of this full-frontal naked photo of MMA fighter Tito Ortiz to cleanse our collective palate, if you will. TMZ says:
The photo surfaced [last night] — when it was uploaded to Tito’s personal photo-sharing website, which is connected through his Twitter page.
The photo appears to be a naked self-portrait shot with a cell phone.
Tito tweeted [shortly thereafter], “Someone hacked my fucking phone.”
Note to guys everywhere: if you’re gonna take a picture of your wiener — impressive though it may be — you don’t want to do it with a huge shit-eating grin on your face. It gives the same aesthetic effect of a retard who pulled down his pants on the bus because somebody told him to, but wasn’t quite in on the joke. You want to think more along with lines of Senior Portrait Pensive, or maybe a nice Blue Steel. Something that says, “I’m serious about my wiener, and you can be, too.”
Wife Jenna Jameson at Scott Disick’s birthday party last week:
Mar 4, 2011
I know that you, like me, have spent many sleepless nights tossing and turning, wondering if you’ll ever get to see Chris Brown’s wiener before you die. Well, the wait is over, my friends: Chris Brown’s wiener in all its pube-shorn NSFW entirety. I don’t like to call myself a hero or anything. I’m more of a modern day Robin Hood, robbing the rich to give to the wiener-less. Why else would I be carrying this 12th century bow and arrow in my laptop case?
NSFW video of the picture after the jump, or click the header for the good stuff.
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Oct 29, 2010
Those rumored Kanye West wiener pics have finally hit the interwebs (click header for NSFW Kanye penis action), and my new best friends at Media Take Out managed to get their hands on them. The bad news is he’s in dire need of some serious manscaping. The good news is if he ever needs a triple bypass, the doctors should have no problem finding a replacement vein. Or seven.
