I don’t want to alarm anyone, but the last time I saw someone lose this much weight, there was a vengeful gypsy and a pie-transferable curse involved. Now we just wait for Seth Rogen to start growing scales and Jason Segel to get a wicked case of acne.

John Goodman showed up at last night’s AFI Life Achievement Award a solid six dress sizes smaller than he was last year. Last time I saw him, he was pushing 400 pounds and could have probably fit an entire smoked turkey under one of his tits; now he looks just like he did in his Walter Sobchak prime. The Manzier and The Bro just lost the only celebrity spokesmodel who could have ever done their product justice.

Before pics:

After pics:

Dying to know the secret behind Britney Spears’ “bikini body?” Then it’s safe to assume you’re severely myopic. OK! Magazine says

The sexy mom can credit her slamming new body in part to the Sunfare diet, a gourmet meal delivery company which counts stars such as Eva Longoria Parker, Marcia Cross and Khloe Kardashian among its fans. [Sunfare] incorporates a balanced, low-carb approach of three big meals and two snacks per day, all documented through the delivery system.

The other major factor behind Brit’s renewed physique is good old-fashioned hard work in the dance studio and on stage.

I’ve seen the secret behind Britney’s bikini body. A bag full of laxatives and a blood stream full of methamphetamines, wasn’t it? Sorry, but shitting my pants and coughing up blood really cramps my style. I’ve already done freshman year once before, thank you very much.

Shopping on Robertson Boulevard in L.A.:

PHOTO SOURCE: Splash News Online