Sep 3, 20093

Pete Wentz is a Giant Vagina

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Pete Wentz throws the first pitch at a Dodgers game

Remember when Ashlee Simpson got pregnant and tried to tell us it was because Pete Wentz inserted his Tab A into her Slot B?  Well, listen, I don’t want to shake the foundations of anyone’s reality or anything, but Pete Wentz wears more eyeliner than I do, minces around in ladies’ jeans, has a pixie haircut, and pitches a baseball like he’s flinging rose petals at a Miss America coronation.  I think Ashlee Simpson has some explaining to do, because you’d have an easier time getting viable sperm out of a Bratz doll than from Pete Wentz.

Sporty Spice throwing the first pitch at the Dodgers game:

Pete Wentz throws the first pitch at a Dodgers gamePete Wentz throws the first pitch at a Dodgers gamePete Wentz throws the first pitch at a Dodgers gamePete Wentz throws the first pitch at a Dodgers game

Pete Wentz throws the first pitch at a Dodgers gamePete Wentz throws the first pitch at a Dodgers gamePete Wentz throws the first pitch at a Dodgers gamePete Wentz throws the first pitch at a Dodgers game