I’m all for diet and exercise, but Miley Cyrus has lost so much weight that her head-to-body ratio is all wrong. Her head looks freakishly large, like the vertebrae in her neck might telescope at any moment under the strain of such an enormous load. She looks like a marionette minus the strings.
Fresh off a seizure spawned by a myriad of technically-legal chemicals and her ex-husband’s affair, Demi Moore has checked into the famous Cirque Lodge in Utah. Radar Online says:
Ashton Kutcher’s estranged wife began her treatment at Cirque Lodge several days ago, a source tells E!
It’s expected she’ll be there at least 30 days.
The drug and alcohol treatment center overlooking the Sundance ski resort is a celeb favorite. Mary-Kate Olsen [and] Lindsay Lohan [were both] treated there.
And what resounding successes those two gals are. Mary-Kate Olsen has clearly conquered her anorexia and Lindsay Lohan is the very picture of sobriety these days. Forty grand might seem like a lot of money, but with an impressive track record like that, I think we can all agree it’s money well-spent. They’ll have Demi cured in no time.
If Keira Knightley gets any skinnier, you’re going to be able to see her kidneys through her skin. I swear, you could paint her yellow and she’d be virtually indistinguishable from a rubber chicken.
At the premiere of “A Dangerous Method” in London last night:
Demi Moore reportedly had a seizure Monday night before being hospitalized for “exhaustion,” which is Hollywood talk for “anorexia and a coke problem.” Radar Online says:
“[Demi] collapsed after having an epileptic seizure,” [a source] said.
“Demi is in [the hospital] getting treated for anorexia, as well as other issues that caused her seizure… she has not taken care of her health at all lately.”
The actress is reportedly seeking help for substance abuse as well.
And before you say anything, no, that’s not Demi Moore up there in the header. It’s Kelly Brook in a PVC bodysuit for her role in the new straight-to-DVD movie “Heavy Metal.” Why? I’ll give you two reasons:
1) 32
2) E
And also, she doesn’t look like she was just dredged up from the bottom of a lake she’ll forever haunt. Advantage: Kelly Brook.
If someone had told me that there were busty girls in string bikinis jumping up and down and spreading their legs in Bochee Ball, I might have actually played it, instead of just yelling that it was a game for faggots and urinating on the green. In hindsight, that may have been a tad premature.
LeAnn Rimes playing Bochee Ball/aerial jumping jacks in Hawaii (10 more pics after the jump):
Nothing ruins a good bikini picture like a stupid baby. It makes masturbating take twice as long, and as you well know, I don’t have that kind of time. Not while the ancient flowers in the Larunya Mines in Zelda Skyward Sword still beckon.
LeAnn Rimes in Hawaii over the weekend:
PHOTO SOURCE: Fame Pictures
Yesterday I said that Leann Rimes’ ass was all flat and sad and Caucasoid, and then today I see these pictures of her in a different bikini. Look, I’m not one to mince words, and I’m not one who won’t own up to mistakes. I was wrong about Leann Rimes’ ass. Plain and simple. It’s just all part of the learning process. Mistakes are how we grow. I know it will take a while for you to trust me again, but with time and healing, I think we can make our way through this.
Leann Rimes and her very not-sad not-flat technically-Caucasoid-but-not-in-the-way-I-meant-it ass in Hawaii
PHOTO SOURCE: Fame Pictures
Photos of Angelina Jolie boarding her private plane looking like a damn corpse have sparked new concerns that the actress is suffering from an eating disorder. She’s barely a hundred pounds soaking wet and she’s five fucking eight. Of course the bitch has an eating disorder. Jesus. Doesn’t anybody notice this? I feel like I’m taking crazy pills The Daily Mail says:
According to Grazia magazine, Angelina survives on as little as 600 calories a day.
“Angelina has been known to start her day with little more than a spoonful of coconut oil and a handful of cereal,” a source told Grazia last week.
“Sometimes she’ll skip lunch altogether or will just grab a few almonds and some gummy bears while she’s on the go, or will have a protein-based shake.
A lot of people are worried that she is taking things too far… everyone has been begging her to eat more, but unfortunately she just doesn’t seem to be putting on any more weight.”
Angelina Jolie was so stunningly beautiful back in her Lara Croft heyday, and now she looks like something that should be haunting a lake. She’s all sinew and bone. Shaking hands with her would be like shaking hands with a damn eagle.
And now for someone who clearly ISN’T anorexic, the lovely Salma Hayek at the “Puss ‘n Boots” photocall in Rome:
PHOTO SOURCE: Fame Pictures
The only woman in the world who might love herself more than Adrianne Curry is LeAnn Rimes, as evidenced by her insatiable need to post pictures of herself in a bikini on the internet every five goddamn minutes. Like these two pics, for example, taken while on honeymoon with current husband Eddie Cibrian in Mexico last week. The Daily Mail says:
The holiday picture – which shows the Grammy award winner on the beach in a blue and white two piece – quickly prompted concern among some of her thousands of her followers.
A fan wrote that the star looked ‘scary skinny.’
But LeAnn jumped straight on the defense, saying: ‘Those are called abs not bones love.’
She went on to say: ‘Thx but this is my body and I can promise you I’m a healthy girl. I’m just lean. Thx for your concern but no need to be.’
If those sharp, jutting, pointy things on her lower torso are supposed to be her abdominal “muscles”, she’s either in the process of digesting a bunch of roofing tiles or a baby pterodactyl is trying to claw its way out of her abdomen. Hips don’t lie, my friends. Just ask Shakira.
Demi Lovato alluded to having anorexia shortly after her release from rehab, but never actually revealed the reason she was there in the first place. There were rumors of binge drinking, cutting, drug use and assault, but the Sonny with a Chance star tells Seventeen magazine she was there for her “life-long” issues with an eating disorder. Us Magazine quotes her as saying:
“I don’t think there’s going to be a day when I don’t think about food or my body, but I’m living with it, and I wish I could tell young girls to find their safe place and stay with it.
There have been times when I definitely have been tempted to get rid of my dinner. I will deal with it for the rest of my life because it’s a life-long disease.
It’s very crucial that you get your feelings out, but don’t ever inflict harm on your own body because your body is so sacred. If you are going through that dark period, go to your family and closest friends. Don’t put yourself in danger.”
Oh, boo-fucking-hoo. Everyone has their own potentially fatal way of dealing with their problems. It’s called being a teenager. Starving yourself is just what rich white girls do when they’re too stuck-up to try Jack Daniels and anal in high school. Your loss, sister!
On her way to New Journey Eating Disorder Center in Santa Monica:
PHOTO SOURCE: Fame Pictures
Leann Rimes posted a picture of herself in a bikini on her Twitter yesterday (above, right) in an attempt to convince you that she’s not suffering from an eating disorder (above, left). And then to prove just how not eating-disorder-stricken she is, she repeatedly talked about how much she loved cookies(!) and pizza(!) and for good measure added that she didn’t have an eating disorder like seven more times. From her Twitter:
LOVE Thin Mint Cookies! I never know where to buy GS Cookies, so I’m always elated when someone I know has them! Love Thin Mints frozen!”
@lindseyg696 you don’t know me, you have NO idea what I weigh or eat, so why should you have any opinion about my weight?
@lindseyg696 I own that I am healthy and take dang goof care of my body, that’s what I own.
@KarlaHoffman last time we ordered pizza for the boys at our house you were there and I didn’t pass it up. You’ve witnessed it!
@sheilalambert11 I have no eating disorder and I’m healthy
@sweetness509 obviously! I’m not promoting anything BUT health. I workout 3-4 times a week and eat a healthy diet and treat myself.
@amejean @karlahoffman opinion should be based off of facts! There are no facts here other than yes, obviously I’ve lost weight, but I’m not unhealthy, I eat and take care of my body. I went through a divorce and couldn’t get out of bed for days for two years! I’m happy, healthy, joyful and active and work my butt off. That’s life, things change up and down. Real concern comes from people that know me and love me, not a stranger. From a stranger it’s called judgement and not needed. DONE.
Methinks the lady doth protest too much. Me also thinks nobody really giveth a shit either way. ‘Tis Leann Rimes. The only reason I even posteth these tweets was to misquoteth Hamlet and talketh like an 18th century bard.
22-year-old Victoria’s Secret model Candice Swanepoel revealed a shockingly emaciated frame when she stepped out in their new swimwear line at The Mondrian hotel in L.A. yesterday. Between swirling around the Ark of the Covenant and commandeering the Army of the Dead in an epic battle against Sauron’s dark army, I bet she stays really busy this time of year.
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