Well, whaddya know — I guess there is one thing the French do better than us: Eva Mendes‘ nipples. But to be fair, they’re also better at crying and running away.
Monica Bellucci played Jesus’ mom in “The Passion of the Christ,” so I’m not entirely comfortable seeing her naked. I figure lust and masturbation are plenty bad enough without my adding blasphemy to the mix. I’m still trying to make up for all the deadly sins I covered in college.
Victoria’s Secret model Alessandra Ambrosio is in this month’s French Elle, and blah blah blahbitty blahbitty blah blah seriously, if you’re still reading words at this point, it’s time to invest in an Aphex Twin album and an International Male catalog, because you’re fucking gayer than Rainbow Christmas. Fact.
You’re welcome:
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