Kylie Bisutti beat more than 10,000 hopefuls when she won the Victoria’s Secret Model Search two years ago, but she has since abandoned the company because she felt Jesus didn’t want her modeling lingerie. She said in an interview (via the Daily Mail):
“I just started becoming more uncomfortable with [modeling lingerie] because of my faith… my body should only be for my husband and it’s just a sacred thing.
I didn’t really want to be that kind of role model… I had a lot of younger Christian girls that were looking up to me and then thinking that it was okay for them to walk around and show their bodies in lingerie to guys.”
I personally think she’s rejecting her God-given talents, because breasts like those could certainly convince me to give religion another try. Hell, “Jesus Christ” were the first words outta my mouth when I saw this picture of her in a bikini.
In Maxim before her convictions ruined everything:
Nicki Minaj made an appearance this morning for Good Morning America’s Summer Concert Series, and naturally her boob managed to finagle its way out of her low-cut top into the open for millions of viewers to see. I don’t know why anyone would be surprised this would happen, it’s Nicki-skanky-Minaj for chrissakes. You’ve kind of got to expect this kind of thing, just like you’d expect a baboon to pick its ass. The only thing that would have been surprising would be if some actual talent had popped out.
Paris Hilton up and walked out of ABC News interview at her L.A. home earlier this week when correspondent Dan Harris dared to suggest that her new show’s poor ratings indicated that she was “past her prime” and no longer the reality star du jour. “Du jour” of course meaning “of the butt.” Good Morning America says:
Others [i.e. the Kardashians] have usurped her role at the top of the reality television pecking order [and] her latest series, “The World According to Paris” debuted to a dismal 400,000 viewers.
Though Hilton said that she doesn’t feel that [Kim] Kardashian [is] overshadowing her and that [her show's poor] ratings didn’t bother her, she walked out of the interview with the mention of her moment having passed.
After storming off, Hilton eventually returned to the interview after some cajoling to discuss her ideas about her own reinvention.
I never understood Paris Hilton’s appeal in the first place. She’s built like a giraffe and she’s got the one wonky eye and that baby voice thing she and Kim Kardashian do is goddamn repulsive. My jaw and fist involuntarily clench up just at the sight of them. And once I’ve clenched my fist, it cannot be un-clenched until it has spilled blood. Or drywall. Needless to say, “Keeping up with the Kardashians” cost me my deposit on more than one apartment.
Chris Brownlost his shit on Good Morning America earlier this week, and now he’s gone and lost his publicist. See how I did that? They don’t pay me the big bucks for nothin’. Page Six says:
Brown’s spokeswoman, Tammy Brook, will no longer be representing him after the star trashed his GMA dressing room, smashed a window and left without his shirt from the morning talk show earlier this week.
Sources close to the star tell us she and Brown have decided to “end their relationship.”
I doubt she quit because of the whole window incident. I think it goes much deeper than that. I think she quit because Chris Brown has the faggiest fucking hair since Susan Powter. It’s time to stop the insanity, Chris!
Chris Brown has finally issued a public apology for smashing his dressing room window after he was forced to field questions about his 2009 assault on Rihanna’s face on Tuesday’s Good Morning America. The Sun quotes him as saying:
“First of all, I just wanna apologize to anybody who was startled in the [GMA] office, anybody who was offended or really disappointed in my actions, because I was disappointed with the way I acted.
A lot of people don’t know what went down, and obviously when I do shows or when I do interviews, we always send out a talking point sheet.
As the interview proceeded, I was thrown off by it. I felt like they told us this just so they could get us on the show so they can exploit me.
So I took it very, very hard and I really kinda kept my composure throughout the whole interview, although you can see me upset, I kept my composure, I did my performance.
And when I got backstage I just let off steam. I didn’t physically hurt anyone, I didn’t try to hurt anyone, I just wanted to release the anger that I had inside me because I felt that I worked so hard for this music and… I felt like people kept just trying to take it away from me. So yes, I got very emotional, and I wanna apologize for acting like that.
Did you get that? He’s apologizing for being the victim of exploitation here. He’s sorry that the folks at GMA are sensationalism-driven liars and deceivers who drove him to a violent physical outburst with their carefully-orchestrated machinations. He’s sorry that people keep trying to take away the music that he “worked so hard for.” Not once does he actually apologize for throwing a chair through a window and chest-bumping a producer mid-tantrum. You wanna say I’m sorry, how about you start with that godawful song “I Can Transform Ya?” Because I know I’m sure as hell sorry about that song. I’m also sorry about his faggoty-ass hair and that sleeveless denim vest he’s wearing. Come to think of it, maybe I’m the one who should really be apologizing here.
Chris Brown is a spoiled, narcissistic woman-beater whose “talent” hinges solely on his ability to rhyme words with other words, but he’s famous, so of course ABC won’t be pressing charges over the window he smashed yesterday. TMZ says:
Chris Brown has dodged a bullet after his alleged window-smashing meltdown at “Good Morning America” Tuesday, because ABC has decided NOT to press charges.
Law enforcement [said] the NYPD will not investigate the matter because there is no complaining victim.
That’s especially good news for Brown — because he’s currently on probation for beating up Rihanna and could have faced prison time if the judge violated his probation on grounds he committed vandalism.
We’re told the judge will not violate Chris’ probation unless New York prosecutes him… and that’s not going to happen.
He might have gotten off on the vandalism charges, but there’s still a chance Annie Lennox will be pressing charges for the theft of her signature ‘do. Don’t think Sisqo’s not pissed about it, either.
Chris Brown chucked a chair through the window of his Good Morning America dressing room and ripped off his shirt to fight the show’s producer after GMA correspondent Robin Roberts dared to question him about Rihanna instead of plug his shitty new album. I’m glad to see he finally got that temper under control. TMZ says:
After the interview, Brown freaked out, storming into his dressing room and screaming so loud, the people in hair and makeup became alarmed and called security.
Brown was out of control, and one source present tells us he smashed a window in his dressing room, and the glass shattered and some shards fell onto 43rd and Broadway. ABC security [says] the window was shattered with a chair.
We’re told by the time security rushed the area, Brown had ripped off his shirt and confronted a segment producer, got in his face and stared him down. People from the show got in between Chris and the producer to diffuse the situation.
We weren’t there, so we don’t know what really happened. Maybe the window deserved it. Maybe the window was going through texts on his phone and dared to ask him why he was fucking around. You know how uppity windows can get.
Proving to everyone beyond a shadow of a doubt that being high on Charlie Sheen is much worse than being high on real drugs could ever be, Charlie Sheen took and passed a drug test on air during an interview with Radar Online (you can watch video of him yelling at the interviewer and smoking a cigarette with his nose while watching the interview on his TV here). In other less surprising news, Charlie Sheen’s longtime publicist has called it quits. Perhaps he tired of being the man who never sleeps. The Daily Mail says:
Sheen’s publicist of seven years, Stan Rosenfield, had quit.
‘I worked with Charlie Sheen for a long time and I care about him very much, however, at this time, I’m unable to work effectively as his publicist and have respectfully resigned’, Rosenfield said.
Sheen’s response? As refined and dignified as you’d expect from a man who has tiger blood flowing in his veins and fire-breathing fists:
“He’s a pussy,” he said. “He’s not allowed to quit, so you’re fired.”
Given his last outburst, I’m just surprised Charlie didn’t call out his publicist for having the first name Shmekel and being a circumcised member of the house of David. Being off the drugs seems to have given Charlie a modicum of restraint. He didn’t even mention the unsavory Jew smell!
Charlie Sheen may love himself some drugs, but he doesn’t really need anything to get a high, because he is MADE of drugs. And he comes with its own consumer advisory. The Washington Post explains,
“I am on a drug. It’s called ‘Charlie Sheen.’ It’s not available because if you try it once, you will die. Your face will melt off, and your children will weep over your exploded body,” the benched star of CBS’s “Two and a Half Men” said in an interview with ABC News, portions of which aired on its morning newsfotainment show, “Good Morning America.”
“I woke up and decided, you know, I’ve been kicked around. I’ve been criticized,” Sheen continued. ” I’ve been like the ‘Aw, shucks’ guy with, like, this bitchin’ rock-star life. And I’m just finally going to completely embrace it, wrap both arms around it and love it violently. And defend it violently through violent hatred.”
During his various interviews, Sheen acknowledged he’d used drugs in the past, saying the last time he used drugs, he “probably took more than anybody could survive.”
“I was banging seven-gram rocks and finishing them, because that’s how I roll,” he told “GMA.” “I have one speed. I have one gear — go.”
Sheen described himself as superhuman, citing a “different constitution,” “different brain” and “different heart” than normal people, allowing him to survive his drug binges.
“I got tiger blood, man,” he said. “My brain … fires in a way that is — I don’t know, maybe not from this particular terrestrial realm.”
But he’s off drugs now, Sheen says, because it “bored the hell out of [him] after a while.” And relapse is not an option, he insists, because “I blinked and I cured my brain. … ‘Can’t’ is the Cancer of Happen.”
“GMA” wound up its interview with results of a drug test that Sheen submitted to, which proved, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that he’s been clean for at least 24 hours.
He definitely sounds like he’s in a manic episode of bi-polarism. It’s not a fun disease, but I can’t feel sorry for him since he’s the one who pumped himself full of drugs, which can trigger symptoms in bi-polar persons. Unfortunately for his family and friends, they’ll have to wait until he does something to harm someone else or himself (more than he already has done) before they can 5150 him.
Jesse James’ much-anticipated interview is set to air on Nightline tonight, and a few more teaser clips have been dribbled out of Good Morning America’s urethra and into the adult diaper that is the internet (see above). If you’re wondering why he’s coming forward now, Jesse says it’s because the photos of him playing Nazi that surfaced last month unfairly portrayed him as a racist and an anti-Semite. Us Magazine says
“Dealing with losing my marriage and my son and embarrassing everyone and decimating my life… but to be called a racist on top of that is, it makes me really sad,” he said.
Of the photos, James said, “I could tell by the look on my face it was a joke that was funny then, probably for a minute, but then looking at it in the context of now and in my life, it’s not funny. There’s not a racist bone in my body.”
When asked why he adopted a black child, James said he “didn’t care what color” the baby was. “My only prerequisite for adopting a baby: I want the baby that needs us the most.”
But he “threw away” their “amazing marriage” and “wanted to get caught… [Sandra] had her suspicions, but, you know, I lied, and lied my way out of it,” he said. “I lied to everyone about everything, even to myself.”
That’s right — he didn’t care what color the baby was. Just so long as it wasn’t a goddamn dirty Jew baby. And you can quote him on that one.
From the late 15th century until the end of the 18th century in Europe, having red hair was considered a definitive “mark of the devil” that was punishable by death, usually by burning at the stake or drowning. Too bad Miley Cyrus wasn’t born in France in 1743.
Whitney Houston’s first public singing performance in nearly a decade was a big ol’ hot mess. The NY Daily News says
“I’m sorry,” [Houston] told the capacity crowd at Rumsey Playfield, where she was singing as part of a segment to run on tomorrow’s “Good Morning America” in the 8 a.m. hour. Houston blamed her evident vocal problems on the “Oprah Winfrey Show,” which she had taped Monday to air on Sept. 14th. “When I’m talking, I should be singing,” Houston said. Not even the most loving fan could have missed the cracks in her voice that came once in each song. Or the fact that Houston treated the highest notes the same way drivers with new cars treat pot holes.
Oh, come on now. It wasn’t that bad. Especially if it was Whitney Houston doing James Brown doing a Whitney Houston impression. In that case, I’d have to say it was spot-on!
Crack is wack, crack is cheap — just like that wig:
