These pictures settle that whole “is Peter Parker a flaming homo” question for me. Oh sure, you can tell me how this was part of a “stunt sequence” or some other hooey, but I know what two men dry-humping each other look like. No, really. There was that one time when I came home early from school and my dad was in this exact position on the kitchen counter with the plumber. Awk-ward!

There’s only one good reason to have your feet up in the air while straddling someone:

Photo source: Fame Pictures

Gavin Rossdale finally admitted to his gayness last month, but now there are finally pictures of it to gratuitously mock. The Daily Mail says:

A new photo has emerged of Bush rocker Gavin Rossdale with his one-time gay lover, 80s pop star Marilyn.

The image shows the couple dressed in matching white suits. Marilyn – famed for his long blonde hair – has his head nestled into a teenage Rossdale’s chest, his arm around his waist.

Wow. It doesn’t get much gayer than this. And I just drove myself to a LAN party in a minivan carrying a caricature of myself as I would look as drawn by Japanese, so I should know. Okay, so my mom was driving, but you get my point here. That picture is really fucking gay.

I already told you all about his gayness a year ago, but Gavin Rossdale is just now publicly owning up to the sexual relationship he had with 1980′s New Romantic gender-bender Marilyn. The Daily Mail says:

Asked why he has waited until now to speak out, Rossdale, 44, said he was scared of ruining his career.

“I think at the outset there was a sort of fear—that was right at the beginning of Bush, and I didn’t want it to be part of it,” he said.

“It’s just one of those things: Move on. When you’re 17, Jesus Christ. I don’t think there’s anything strange about any form of—you’re learning about life. It’s a part of growing up. That’s it. No more, no less.’

Asked if it was just a one-time experimentation, he replied: ‘Yeah. That was it. You have to know what you like, and I know what I like.’

But maybe he’s not so sure about what he likes after all, because as soon as the interview was over, he decided he didn’t like having told the whole damn world he was into butt sex with dudes for a while. Mostly because he’d never actually admitted it to his wife:

Rossdale reportedly ‘pleaded’ with the editors of Details magazine not to include his admission in the interview, apparently because wife Gwen Stefani did not know about the dalliance, but they refused.

Sources said she was aware of the rumors but her husband’s candor meant that for the first time he had to tell her they were true.

Spouses do NOT like it when you tell an intimate secret to everyone else but them. Like if you told all his co-workers you used to be a porn star named Salty Melons or that you had both male and female genitalia until that surgery five years ago. That’s what both my ex-husbands deemed “deal-breakers.”

Ali Larter in next month’s Mexican Esquire, because it’s way too gay in here:

Even though “The Bachelor” star Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi didn’t actually have sex for most of their relationship, Jake wants everyone to know that he is NOT gay. And never has a more non-gay sentiment been proclaimed in such a masculine fashion (via Radar Online):

A friend of The Bachelor star since childhood [claims] the lack of intimacy with Vienna is not because of Jake’s sexual orientation, [saying], “Look at him. He’s the all-American perfect catch of a guy. If he wanted to go out and just get laid by beautiful women, he could, no doubt. But sex to him means and has always meant something. He was that guy in high school that waited for the relationship to deepen before he slept with a girl.”

Oh, we had a word for those kind of guys back in high school. “Fag” and “homo” and “tearoom queen,” as I recall. I’d have an easier time believing the bandana-ed butt pirate from “Big Time Rush” liked vagina than I would this queer.

Feigning heterosexual love for the cameras in March:

PHOTO SOURCE: Fame

PHOTO CREDIT: InTouch Weekly

Before he married Gwen Stefani back in 2002, Gavin Rossdale spent half a decade of his life in the arms the man pictured above (and I use the word “man” here loosely). In Touch Weekly says

Gavin had a long-standing secret love affair with Marilyn — a male rocker who looked remarkably like Gwen. “He was the love of my life,” Marilyn [says]. Though Boy George broke the news of Gavin and Marilyn’s tumultuous romance in his 1995 book, Gavin denied it. At the time, Marilyn denied the affair as well.

But he says he did it only because Gavin asked him to. “He was just becoming successful in America,” Marilyn explains. “I agreed to lie against every grain of my being.” Now, Marilyn wants to set the record straight. In an exclusive interview with In Touch, [he says], “We were together five years, but it felt like 40.”

Gavin’s rep denies the story.

Sorry, but you don’t “used to” be gay. Just like you can’t be “kinda” pregnant or “mostly” sober. You either like the wiener or you don’t. Case closed.

Vintage shirtless Gavin for my homos and my ladies: