Are they or aren’t they? After linking to that story about Christina Hendrick’s boobs possibly being fake after all, that’s the question now whenever I see her. I’m still not quite convinced they’re fake, and if they are, that’s a damn fine boob job, to make them that large and not seem like they can stand up on their own. In any case, can we enjoy them if they’re fake as well as we could if they were real? Damn straight we can. Damn straight.
At Harvey Weinstein’s shindig with assorted members of the family Rodentia:
Here’s Nicole “Coco” Austin leaving her imprint on the fashion world. And by “imprint”, I mean “getting pummeled by twin silicone bags”. This look here is for that woman who doesn’t know just what to dress up her butt implants with. What exactly would you call the dressing up of asses? Asserdashery? I don’t know. Coco is treading upon a whole new world of prêt-à-porter here. I just hope she doesn’t decide to sit down.
This conglomeration of plastic is 30-year-old (I shit you not) Alicia Douvall, who I’ve sure as hell never heard of. From a quick Google search it seems that she’s a glamor model/reality show contestant. All I know is, somewhere Barbie is missing her plastic ass. I mean, WTF is that? Yeah, I know her boobs probably have their own gravitational pull, and her lips are threatening to float away, but good God. It looks like her thighs are trying to lay eggs. Bleh.
The always-classy Pamela Anderson got so drunk yesterday she had to be hauled out of L.A. nightclub Guys and Dolls at two in the morning. The Daily Mail says
The former Baywatch beauty was pictured staggering out of a Hollywood nightclub, propped up by a minder.
With her head bowed and her hair in a bedraggled mess, Pammy, 42, [was] sporting some rather unattractive stains around the bust of her skin-tight short grey dress.
Maybe it was sweat patches from her efforts on the nightclub dance floor, or perhaps she had just spilt drink down her.
Or maybe her implants ruptured and started leaking. Or maybe her nipples leave skidmarks now. Some mysteries were never meant to be solved, my friends, like Keith Richard’s liver or how far east can you go before you’re technically heading west. You’ll just end up hurting yourself if you think about it too much.
No, this isn’t the work of some junior high boy with Photoshop, and there’s nothing wrong with your monitor. It’s more like the work of a plastic surgeon without the word “No” in his vocabularly. Porn actress Mary Carey’s chest looks like some little cartoon dude attached a bicycle pump to her boobs and went to town. What’s funny is that without her boobs, she’d pretty much be straight up and down. She really doesn’t have any hips and her waist isn’t very defined, even though she’s very thin. I guess in order to make it in porn she had to bolt those balloons to her chest. Well the good news is, if she’s ever in a car accident, she carries her own frontal protection.
Although she made a living off of being naked, reality star (?) Tila Tequila doesn’t want you watching her “stolen” sex tape. According to TMZ
Just days after she Ustreamed herself in a naked rant, a new XXX video surfaced on a porn site called 4tube.com featuring Tila in a very compromising adult position with a naked man.
Tila doesn’t know why the video is surfacing now, but she claims it was ripped from a laptop that she reported stolen roughly two years ago — and now she’s threatening to sue the site for posting the clip.
The only thing surprising about this is that it’s been this long without a Tila Tequila sex tape on the interwebs. I just assumed she already had one or twenty of ‘em out there. Didn’t you? It’s like finding out the Hanukkah Fairy isn’t Jewish or that your mom isn’t a whore. Okay, okay — settle down — geez, I’m just being facetious here. Everybody already knows your mom’s a whore. I was just using that as a frame of reference.
