^{PHOTO CREDIT: Nine MSN}

Lisa Rinna went on the Today Show yesterday to plug her new book “Rinnavation,” and naturally the talk turned to her comically oversized lips. She said:

“I went out and had silicone put in my top lip 23 years ago. Period, end of story. I had a small top lip, my girlfriend and I went and did it together [after seeing Barbara Hershey in "Beaches,"]… but what happens is, after years and years, you form some scar tissue.

But I like [them]! I’ve always been okay with [them]. I’ve always felt good about [them].”

She might have said she was going for the “Barbara Hershey” look, but it’s pretty obvious her doctor heard the (NSFW) “bulging hemorrhoid” look. It’s an easy mistake to make. That’s why you never want to talk to your plastic surgeon with a mouth full of saltwater taffy from a distance of 50 paces.

Dancing with the Stars’ Priscilla Presley’s gorgeous face is the work of one Dr. Daniel Serrano, but don’t go scrambling for a phone book just yet. Dr. Serrano is no longer practicing those “miracle injections that work better than Botox,” mostly because he’s not a real doctor and can’t practice from prison. Lucky for you, there’s still Guatemala and the coast of Brazil. According to TMZ

In fact, Serrano was injecting industrial, low-grade silicone similar to what’s used to lubricate auto parts in Argentina into the faces of these women. The injections caused lumps, paralysis and holes in the faces of some of the women he injected. As for Priscilla — who had no idea she was being injected with silicone — we’re told she’s undergoing corrective work.

Maybe it’s not all bad. So instead of getting “a face that could launch a thousand ships,” you’ve got “a face that could reduce premature wear on cylinders and pistons and keep your engine running smoothly for years to come.” Last time I checked, there wasn’t a Mrs. Goodwrench anywhere around!