Madonna’s daughter Lourdes Ciccone Leon was photographed out and about wearing a SpineCor corrective brace, which is commonly used in the treatment of scoliosis.  And sure, maybe she has scoliosis.  A lot of kids have scoliosis, because good posture is for losers.  It’s also possible that she does not have scoliosis and she simply sustained an injury.  SpineCor braces are often used by dancers, for example, but serious back injury is not terribly common in one so young as Lourdes.  I suspect it’s more likely related to the fact that she probably has to bend over backwards at her mother’s whim at least eight or nine times a day.  That shit takes a toll, you know.

This is what the SpineCor brace looks like:

The mysterious foot injury that prevented Jennifer Lopez from appearing as a guest judge on the season finale of Project Runway last Friday was noticeably absent when she competed in the Nautica Malibu Triathlon just two days later. Something smells fishy, and it’s not just JLo’s cave bacon after that four-mile run! According to MSNBC

One of the rumors swirling around Lopez’s sudden injury is that she was angry with The Weinstein Company, which produces the reality show.

“Jennifer was hoping for a part in an upcoming Weinstein film, and she was told the day before (the ‘Project Runway’ show) that she wasn’t getting it,” the source says. “She was angry, so she pulled out.”

Interestingly, that was the first time I’ve ever seen the words “angry” and “pulled out” in a sentence without the words “forgot to.” Fortunately, that’s never an issue when doing it in the butt. That’s why four out of five sluts recommend anal sex over traditional vaginal intercourse. Sure, you might have anal herpes and hemorrhoids the size of golf balls, but by God, you’re not going to end up pregnant by some dude who puked in your hair and whose last name you can’t remember! The more you know…

_{This public service announcement brought to you by the makers of Boil Ease^TM medicated wipes — because the fun doesn’t have to end where your anal fissures begin.}

JLo at the Oscar de la Renta and Marc Jacobs shows during Fashion Week: