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Ellen Pompeo Sarah Rodriguez Jumpsuit

I think it’s pretty obvious that Sara Ramirez won this round. Her jumpsuit doesn’t make it look like she’s carrying a pantload. Also, Sara’s hair and accessories are way better. Ellen Pompeo’s necklace looks like it belongs on a dungeon master. All it needs is a big skeleton key hanging from the end of it. Advantage: Sara.

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Hilary Duff paired a massive Dannijo statement necklace with a Maje silk romper (available here from Net-A-Porter) at the “Planes” premiere on Monday, and while I’m instinctively leery of rompers, this one actually isn’t so bad. It isn’t so good, either, but it could definitely be worse. That said, it’s still a romper, which according to industry experts looks terrible on 99% of the population (and of the 1% who can actually wear them, most are under the age of three and also wearing pigtails with matching bows).

But it’s not the romper or the even the lace on the romper that I don’t like here. And it’s not her giant jellyfish Eye of Sauron necklace or her perfectly undone waves. It’s that the lace and the necklace and the waves are all shoved in there together in the same six square inches of space at the base of her neck. It’s too much, all at once. Lose the lace or pull up the hair, but definitely keep the necklace. Even if it doesn’t see into souls of mortal men or deflect a wizard’s spell, it still probably makes you invisible to werewolves.

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Rarely will you find me endorsing a jumpsuit, much less a sheer nude glittery one, and NEVER will you find me endorsing Vanessa Hudgens, who generally looks like she fell out of Charlotte Russe and landed at Coachella. But then she showed up in Jenny Packham and screen siren makeup at the premiere of “On Frozen Ground,” and my whole world was turned upside down. I probably spent a good five minutes pondering the implausibility of it all while staring soulfully out the window. But then the guy behind me started honking his horn and yelling swears at me in Mexican, so I didn’t really have a chance to work out it all out. I’m still coming to terms with it.

Granted, I would have like the jumpsuit better without sleeves and her hair should have been up, but still… I like it. And I also like all the jumpsuits in the gallery above. Feel free to belt your jumpsuit to negate the unfortunate pajama effect, and steer clear of super-tapered legs and too-busy prints, but don’t shy away from jumpsuits altogether. Because as Vanessa demonstrates, they can really work in your favor.

Kris Humphries is willing to go to court to get back the 20.5 carat diamond Lorraine Schwartz ring he gave to ex-wife (of 72 days) Kim Kardashian, who thus far has refused to return it. Radar Online says:

The basketball player scored a huge discount on the massive bauble, which was valued at a retail price of $2 million, but he still splashed out a cool $750,000 of his hard earned cash for the ring.

“Kris is adamant that he wants the ring back,” a source close to the situation [says]. “And it’s becoming a real sticking point between his and Kim’s attorneys. She has made it plain that she has no intention of returning it though and feels she is within her legal right to refuse as she went through with the wedding. However, Kris contends that the marriage was a total sham and that Kim only wed him for publicity so therefore she has no right to keep such an expensive gift.

“Kris doesn’t understand why Kim would even want to keep the ring anyway. It obviously has no sentimental value as she has publicly declared their wedding as ‘a huge mistake,’ so why doesn’t she just return it to him?”

Why? Because it will be worth twice as much when she sells it on Ebay under the guise of doing it for charity but actually retaining 90% of the profits, that’s why. The Kardashian business model never deviates.

Get a black jumpsuit like Kim’s here from Zac Posen. Maybe you could also find a mortician to do your makeup. Then you’d be twinsies!

As this festive Halloween brooch pinned to my neck brace would suggest, and I’m not a girl who’s afraid to take fashion risks, and a jumpsuit like Elisabetta Canalis‘ is a great way to branch out from your normal fashion routine and try something new. It doesn’t have to be exactly like Elisabetta’s. If you don’t have a 25-inch waist, Diane von Furstenburg makes a great gathered version. There are halterneck, boatneck, strapless and one-shoulder versions you can try. Or you could do a jumpsuit in an unexpected hue or color-blocked, or in a bold print or covered with zippers or ruffles. You have a ton of choices here. Just so long as you don’t come back from the mall with this, you should be fine. Unless you were looking for a Revolutionary War-era fifer costume with easy rear access, in which case John Travolta would like a word with you.

At the grand re-opening of the Cartier store in Milan last week:

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