American Idol’s most annoying judge Kara Dioguardi shows off her bikini bod in next month’s issue of Women’s Health. It’s definitely an improvement, but in the same way that sprinkling glitter on a wart is an improvement. Doesn’t mean the wart is any less annoying; it just means it’s less offensive to look at. A gentleman should know the difference.

The only way these pictures of American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi could be more boring is if they were part of Sunday morning church service with your grandparents and served in a bowl of lukewarm cauliflower purée. I’m downright embarrassed for Maxim. But still not as embarrassed as I’d be if someone actually caught me reading Maxim. Ha ha, I still have my dignity, you know!

Zzzzzzzz:

Bikini Girl Katrina Darrell is telling anyone who will listen that judge Kara DioGuardi humiliated herself during their bikini-off on Wednesday’s American Idol finale. Us Weekly quotes her as saying

“I don’t think [DioGuardi] got the reaction she was hoping for. I think she probably thought I would cry or get mad, and I didn’t — I played it off. She just made herself look stupid. She didn’t make me look stupid. I did really well considering all that I went through.

[Kara] said [to me], ‘Oh sweetie, I hope you didn’t take anything personally.’ I rolled my eyes, and my sister said, ‘Hey, next time you try to upstage my sister, get a spray tan! How old are you? 45 or 50? I looked back and shrugged. She kind of said what I was thinking!”

Bikini Girl clearly did her own highlights with a box of Frost ‘n Glow and put on a solid fifteen pounds (before pic here) of belly fat (compare to Kara’s perfectly toned stomach here), so I can see why she might get a little defensive. Or, you know, play defensive end for the Lions next season. At the rate she’s going, she’ll be pushing triple digits by 2010 easy.