There were lots of celebrities doing the red carpet thing at the MTV Video Music Awards last night. Like “Twilight’s” Ashley Greene, who looked fantastic. She’s like some kind of sexy present in that dress. And speaking of sexy presents, my birthday is coming up, soooo… if any of you were wondering, this is exactly what I want. But I want the one with the real kung-fu grip. And also any cowgirl/sexy nurse accessories she might come with.

TONS more red carpet pics after the jump:

Katy Perry:

Ke$ha:

Lady Gaga:

PHOTO SOURCE: Fame Pictures, Bauer-Griffin Online

(more…)

News of Ke$ha’s sex tape broke back in March, but the first of the supposedly leaked screen caps/naked photos just started making the rounds today. You’ll note that DJ Stolen (I’m not a detective, but probably not his real name) had the foresight to label the seminal fluid on her stomach for you, in case you thought it might have been snot or egg whites, because plenty of women like to do their cholesterol-free cooking topless. I just wish Lipitor had been around when I was growing up. It would have made breakfast with Mom a hell of a lot less disturbing.

Scarlett Johansson for Mango, because Ke$ha looks like a fat sk8er boi/gypsy fortune teller hybrid:

PHOTO SOURCE: Bauer-Griffin

I don’t know how you go about acquiring the body of 45-year old when you’re only 23, but Ke$ha seems to have done it somehow. Maybe Bondi Beach is actually the Bizarro Fountain of Youth.

At Australia’s Bondi Beach yesterday:

PHOTO SOURCE: Pacific Coast News

Pop singer Ke$ha may be the latest celebrity to have a sex tape leaked online. Her rep denies it, of course, but I’m not so sure. Nine MSN says

X-rated stills of the clip were posted on the website ZackTaylor.ca today, along with a post describing the footage as “what appears to be singer Ke$ha engaging in sexual intercourse and other fun stuff with an unknown man”.

The 23-year-old’s rep has put a sock in those rumors though, telling press, “This is not Ke$ha in the photos,” and forcing the website to remove the pics.

So if it’s not her, why force them to take down the pics? That’s like telling the police, “Oh, that’s not my car,” and then pulling the keys out of your purse so you can grab your Creedence CDs and your smokes out of the front seat before they haul it to impound. Dumbass.

In next month’s Maxim here, and the one song she’s famous for after the jump:

(more…)

Noah Cyrus, ten-year-old sister of Miley Cyrus, has been on this site twice, both times for being creepy and disturbing (once for dressing like a child prostitute and once for appearing in a YouTube video singing and dancing to Akon’s “Smack That”). Not satisfied with freaking people out by acting like a preteen whore, Noah has moved on to singing about alcoholic partying, appearing in a YouTube video lip-synching (poorly) to Ke$ha’s “Tik Tok” with an unidentified man.

This is creepy for many reasons, most of which involve the fact that this kid is TEN YEARS OLD.  She should not be singing about brushing her teeth with a bottle of Jack, trying to get a little tipsy, having plenty of beer, or getting crunk and having boys try to touch her junk.  SHE’S TEN.  Even in the Cyrus family, that shit can wait until she’s at least 12.

In other news, holy hell this is one unfortunate looking kid, huh?  Miley’s kinda homely herself, but DAYUM her little sister is fug.  And that’s some serious Hermione Granger hair she’s got going on.  Your family’s got millions, kid.  I think maybe they’d buy you a brush if you asked nicely.