Kris Humphries is willing to go to court to get back the 20.5 carat diamond Lorraine Schwartz ring he gave to ex-wife (of 72 days) Kim Kardashian, who thus far has refused to return it. Radar Online says:

The basketball player scored a huge discount on the massive bauble, which was valued at a retail price of $2 million, but he still splashed out a cool $750,000 of his hard earned cash for the ring.

“Kris is adamant that he wants the ring back,” a source close to the situation [says]. “And it’s becoming a real sticking point between his and Kim’s attorneys. She has made it plain that she has no intention of returning it though and feels she is within her legal right to refuse as she went through with the wedding. However, Kris contends that the marriage was a total sham and that Kim only wed him for publicity so therefore she has no right to keep such an expensive gift.

“Kris doesn’t understand why Kim would even want to keep the ring anyway. It obviously has no sentimental value as she has publicly declared their wedding as ‘a huge mistake,’ so why doesn’t she just return it to him?”

Why? Because it will be worth twice as much when she sells it on Ebay under the guise of doing it for charity but actually retaining 90% of the profits, that’s why. The Kardashian business model never deviates.

Get a black jumpsuit like Kim’s here from Zac Posen. Maybe you could also find a mortician to do your makeup. Then you’d be twinsies!

Kim Kardashian’s husband of 72 days Kris Humphries is being sued by a woman who claims he gave her herpes back in 2010. According to Radar Online:

In the lawsuit for sexual battery, Kayla Goldberg alleges that she met Humphries at The Newsroom Cafe in Los Angeles on August 31, 2010 and that the two went on to have unprotected sex in his hotel room at the Thompson Hotel.

“Once Kayla Goldberg and Kris Humphries arrived at his hotel room they had sexual intercourse more than once, becoming intimate partners,” the court documents assert. “During their interactions Humphries also performed oral sex on Goldberg….Defendant Humphries did not at any time inform Plaintiff that he was infected with the incurable venereal disease, Herpes Simplex Virus.”

Goldberg claims she was “free of any venereal diseases at the time she commenced her intimate relationship with Kris Humphries…Goldberg developed symptoms of herpes about or around four to five days after the first sexual encounter with Humphries. These symptoms included sore throat, fever, body aches and immobilizing pain, extreme pain, extreme vaginal irritation and painful lesions on her genitalia. A doctor officially diagnosed Goldberg with Herpes on September 8, 2010, through an examination and swab test.”

Enjoy the press, Kayla, because this suit won’t get you a dime. You’d have to prove Humphries KNEW that he had herpes before he had sex with you. If not, he’s in the clear. You can’t be blamed for spreading venereal disease if there’s no medical records indicating you have one. It’s the main reason I never get tested. Plus I’ve been banned from most free clinics in the tri-county area.

Get Kim’s black wrap dress look from Joseph here. Spanx and Herpecin HL sold separately.

PHOTO CREDIT: Pacific Coast News

As a guy who’s “been there, done that” with Kim Kardashian (booyah!), Kris Humphries has a few words of advice for Kanye West: Better you than me, bro! Radar Online reports,

Kim Kardashian’s soon-to-be-ex-hubby, Kris Humphries, has some words of advice for the reality star’s new boyfriend, Kanye West. Humphries is telling his friends that the rapper is going to need a lot of patience and luck in his new relationship with Kim, is exclusively reporting.

Despite reports that say Kim and Kanye started dating just two weeks ago, our sources tell us that Humphries says that it has been on again-off again between his estranged wife and the Grammy award winning singer for much longer.

“Kris knows for a fact that this dalliance between Kim and Kanye has been going on for at least the last two years. Kim kept in touch with Kanye after she married Kris and promised him that she would cut off communication with him, but she never did. Kris is suspicious of the timing of Kim deciding to go public with the relationship because the new season of Keeping Up with the Kardashians is premiering in May, and Kanye has released a new album,” an insider tells us.

“Kris knows that Kanye NEVER would have recorded those lyrics about Kim without her permission, period. Kris wonders if Kanye is going to drink the ‘Kardashian Kool Aid’ as he calls it, because if you aren’t a family member and don’t fall in line with what Kris Jenner dictates, you are persona non grata.

“When Kris found out about Kim going public with Kanye, he told his friends he wanted to tell West, ‘good luck dude, you are going to need it.’ Kris knows that while he was with Kim, he was completely faithful, and he has serious doubts that she could say the same,” the insider adds.

Well, no shit, Sherlock. You don’t pick a flower that’s been peed on and then expect it to smell nice, now do you?

The Kardashian / Jenner clan going to church on Easter like good Christians:


The plot thickens in the Kris Humphries / Kim Kardashian divorce proceedings! And by “plot thickens”, I mean, “they just won’t get it over with and go away”. Says New York Post,

Kris Humphries is refusing to divorce Kim Kardashian unless she gives him a “public apology” and admits “the entire wedding was staged by her and her family.”

Sources tell us Nets star Humphries is holding back on a divorce settlement with the reality raven and even turned down a $7 million offer from her to “shut up and go away.”

A friend of Humphries told us, “Kim’s camp is depicting him as money-hungry, but in fact he turned down a $7 million settlement. Her camp is putting out stories about ‘Kim’s divorce hell’ hoping he’ll cave in, but he won’t.

“Kris wants Kim to admit to fraud, to admit the whole thing was staged for publicity, to make a public apology to him because he really wanted a marriage,” our insider said.

Humphries and his camp are furious at what they claim is a campaign by Team Kim to attack him in the press. One friend added, “They are trying to spin Kim as the victim, but Kris isn’t going to stand for it.”

The divorce has been stalled because Humphries took the unusual step of filing for an annulment based on fraud. He is also demanding Kim reveal how much she earned during their 72-day marriage, claiming she hasn’t given an honest account of the money made from their wedding. According to reports, Kris has complied with turning over his bank records and credit-card statements, but Kim so far has not.

Our source added Kris is particularly keen to disprove Kim and her mother Kris Jenner’s claims that they didn’t profit off the wedding.

But a source close to Kim insists she never offered him $7 million and is not attacking him in the press, because “she just wants to move on.”

If (ha ha) their marriage was really a sham, and they both were in on it, I think the best thing to do would to get back together. Seriously, think about it. They’re perfect for each other.  I think that’s what drew them together in the first place. It’s a “The narcissism in your soul greets the narcissism in my soul” kind of connection. It’s like true love, only way more profitable.

Kim K at the Valentino Rodeo Drive Flagship Opening in Beverly Hills:

Kris Humphries and his attorneys are claiming the above clip of Kim Kardashian professing her marital woes to mother Kris Jenner — which aired in a episode of “Kourtney and Kim Take New York” last month — was actually filmed on a soundstage in back December, meaning he now wants an annulment on the grounds that his entire marriage was clearly a big scripted lie. The Daily Mail says:

The scene was presented as having taken place two months before during a business trip the mother and daughter duo took to Dubai in October – just weeks before Kim filed for divorce after 72 days of marriage.

Kim and her mother Kris were spotted leaving a Hollywood TV studio on December 6 with the 31-year-old socialite wearing the same outfit and hairstyle as she does in the scene.

Her mother Kris was photographed following her daughter out of the studio, with an assistant carrying the purple kaftan-style dress she wears in the scene, shot in the back of a limo.

A source [said]: ‘Kris feels that if this is true and the whole conversation was faked, this would help prove that he got married under fraudulent circumstances… yes, this did occur after the marriage, but this is one clear example that could help sway the judge to grant the divorce on the grounds of fraud.’

I tried to get a marriage annulled once, but it turns out “tuck-and-hide” isn’t actually considered fraud under Tennessee state law. But don’t worry — I’m already in the preliminary stages of drafting my own bill to change all that. If we all step up and make our voices heard, together we can make a difference.

Screen caps from Kim’s photo shoot for Esquire:

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