^{PHOTO CREDIT: Nine MSN}

Lisa Rinna went on the Today Show yesterday to plug her new book “Rinnavation,” and naturally the talk turned to her comically oversized lips. She said:

“I went out and had silicone put in my top lip 23 years ago. Period, end of story. I had a small top lip, my girlfriend and I went and did it together [after seeing Barbara Hershey in "Beaches,"]… but what happens is, after years and years, you form some scar tissue.

But I like [them]! I’ve always been okay with [them]. I’ve always felt good about [them].”

She might have said she was going for the “Barbara Hershey” look, but it’s pretty obvious her doctor heard the (NSFW) “bulging hemorrhoid” look. It’s an easy mistake to make. That’s why you never want to talk to your plastic surgeon with a mouth full of saltwater taffy from a distance of 50 paces.

If Nikki Cox was going for that Han-Solo-frozen-in-carbonite look, congratulations. She fucking nailed it.

More of Nikki and husband Jay Mohr at the People’s Choice Awards nominations yesterday:

There’s something different about Jennifer Aniston these days. Can you guess what it is? Hint: it rhymes with nips. Coincidence? I think not. Palm Beach-based cosmetic dermatologist Kenneth Beer, M.D. tells Star Magazine

“There is definitely a difference in the volume and shape of [Jennifer Aniston's] lips. The two peaks of the upper portion of her lip underneath the nose look more prominent and well-defined. Also, the facial line on the right side of her smile is pretty much gone.”

With the surgically-enhanced lips, the shaved-down nose, and the anti-cellulite spa-sculpting treatments, Jennifer Aniston is well on her way to being a whole new woman. And once they finally perfect that pesky personality implant, she might actually be able to hold on to a man for more than fifteen minutes! I hear they’re really making amazing advances with science these days.

Jen’s new lips keep her company on the UCLA campus yesterday:

Nicole Kidman showed off a little more than just her baby bump at “The Golden Compass” premiere in Tokyo today. Have a look at those monstrous surgically enhanced lips of hers. Yikes. They’re like damn bloodworms or something. I just want to thread ‘em with a hook and go trolling for flounder or sprinkle them in my little sister’s hair while I videotape it.