Back in April of last year, Madonna announced amid much fanfare that she would be personally overseeing the construction of a school for girls in her adopted son David’s home country of Malawi. And then her adoption paperwork for Mercy James was approved two months later, and she no longer needed to bribe the Malawi government with promises of “education” and “funding.” See if you can guess whether this school’s getting built now. Fame Pictures says:

Madonna performed a brick-laying ceremony at the school site in Chinkhota Village, Lilongwe, in April 2010, announcing it was her dream to build a school for girls to educate future doctors and lawyers. But less than 12 months later the star is abandoning the plans. Madonna admitted [last week that the project] had been scrapped.

Malawi’s education minister said: “As a Government we’d be interested to know why there is this change.”

I bet I know exactly what went wrong. Somebody went and dropped a house on her. I saw it in this movie one time.

Liar, liar, pants on fire:

PHOTO CREDIT: Fame Pictures

Madonna & Mercy James

Madonna’s appeal of her rejected adoption bid was approved this morning by the Malawi High Court.  From Us Weekly:

On Friday, Malawi’s highest court ruled that Madonna can adopt a second child — 3-year-old Chifundo “Mercy” James — from the African country.

A lower court had denied Madonna’s bid to adopt in April, claiming she had not spent enough time in the country.

But in Friday’s one-hour ruling, Chief Justice Lovemore Munlo praised Madonna’s commitment to helping disadvantaged children and slammed “old laws” that prevented first adoption attempts.

“The matter of residence should be determined at the time of application of the adoption,” Chief Justice Lovemore Munlo said. “In this case, Madonna was in Malawi not by chance but by intention. She is looking after several orphans whose welfare depends on her. She can therefore not be described as a sojourner.”

He later added: “Every child has the right to love.”

Uh huh.  Love.  Suuuuuuuure.  Because Madonna is such a loving mother.  This poor little girl is doomed.  DOOMED, I say!  If she grows up to be even remotely attractive, Madonna might snap and seal her behind a brick wall or something.  But probably not before harvesting her organs in an effort to capture eternal youth, so I guess there’s always that to look forward to.


The rumors are true; Madonna is set to adpot another Malawian child. Maybe that brand of kid suits her tastebuds or something. Digital Spy reports,

A four-year-old girl in Malawi named Mercy James has been taken to a luxury lodge to prepare her for adoption by Madonna, it has been claimed.

The pop superstar is expected to visit the country this weekend after she filed adoption papers there, the Daily Mail reports.

A source said: “Mercy has been handed over to Madonna’s people, who are already at the lodge, and is being cared for by a nanny.

“They are waiting for Madonna to arrive so mother and daughter can be united and then Madonna is expected to take Mercy with her when she leaves.”

The child had been living at an orphanage near Blantyre in southern Malawi and was moved to Kumbali Lodge near Lilongwe.

I hear she’s being ceremonially washed in the waters of a natural spring, then dressed in a beautiful silk sarong. Then her hair will being brushed with fragrant oils and artfully arranged, and adorned with orchids. A little tranquilizer will be added to her milk so she won’t struggle when the feast begins. Godspeed, Mercy James!

madonna adopts

Madonna’s affairs with 22-year-old Brazilian model Jesus Luz and whoremonger Alex Rodriguez may have squelched any chances of her adopting another child from Malawi. According to the NY Daily News

A senior official from Malawi’s Ministry of Women and Child Welfare Development… said morality plays a big part in the adoption process [in Malawi].

He said, “Madonna’s relationships may negatively affect the adoption of [ 3-year-old Mercy James]. The news she is linked to another woman’s husband and a young man less than half her age makes us question her morals.”

Well, I’m glad something finally tipped them off that Madonna wasn’t exactly a saint. You’d think the book of Sex pictures and the Penthouse spread might have sent up a few red flags before, but remember, this is Africa we’re talking about. I’m pretty sure the printed word is still a myth over there, much like “democracy” and “condoms.”

With Gwyneth Paltrow at the afterparty for the premiere of ‘Valentino: The Last Emperor’ last week:

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