May 27, 2009

British “glamour model” Jodie Marsh, who you might remember from such hits as “nipple belt” and “tie without shirt,” has taken a sudden interest in body building. The Daily Mail says
With her toned arms and the rippling muscles in her back, she looked completely different to her former glamour model self. The 30-year-old has dropped three dress sizes from a size 12 to a 6/8, [and she plans] to shed another half a stone and build up even bigger muscles.
Her routine consists of… [meeting with] her trainer two to three times a week, using a Swiss ball and doing free weights for an hour in total, and “sex and dancing in nightclubs.”
Sorry, Toady Jodie, but you don’t get guns like those just from having a lot of sex. If that were the case, I’d be the Incredible fucking Hulk* by now. Abby angry! Abby smash!
* That’s assuming “sex with yourself” qualifies here.
New Magazine photo shoot:



Apr 1, 2008
Madonna opens up about her early battles against societally-imposed standards of beauty in this month’s “green issue” of Vanity Fair. And for the record, we’re talking about this chick right here. This chick and her Ani DiFranco-esque fight against bleaching, waxing, shaving and rouging. Us Weekly quotes her as saying
“I was one of those people that people were mean to. I didn’t shave my legs. I had hair growing under my arms. I refused to wear makeup, or fit the ideal of what a conventionally pretty girl would look like.’”
To her credit, she doesn’t look like a conventionally pretty girl in the above picture. She looks like a young Larry Bird or an albatross that’s just had all its feathers ripped out in some kind of bizarre glue gun accident. I don’t know whether to start shouting career stats at it or toss it some krill and squid and hope it doesn’t bite me.