Michael Jackson’s Private Parts
Tags: messy, michael jackson, Neverland Ranch, private, rooms
After all the tears, tributes, flowers, and hysterical fans, I’d say it’s about time to remember that really obvious side of Michael Jackson that everyone’s been ignoring. Let’s take a trip down memory lane. I’m talking about the Michael with the penchant for little boys, toys, and Jesus juice. So let’s take a gander at the photos of Michael’s inner sanctum, that part of Neverland Ranch that was off-limits to anyone not specifically invited inside, taken as part of the prosecution process back in 2003. Remember? Pedophile? Here’s a fun game: Count the oversized dolls! See if you can find Jacko’s medicine cabinet! See if you can find the bottle of Clorox, always great to wash away those pesky brown spots!
I’m slightly terrified that there’s going to be a big pile of stuffed animals, and his face is going to be camouflaged in with them, motionless and silent, just like that scene from E.T. Someone hold me!

