^{PHOTO CREDIT: Nine MSN}

If you somehow managed to avoid it the first time around, your chances of seeing more pics of Rihanna’s bloodied and battered face just got a whole lot better — it seems the new guy she’s dating has a history of domestic assault. Star Magazine reveals

[There are] charges of abuse by the ex-girlfriend of the singer’s new man, Los Angeles Dodgers star Matt Kemp.

In June 2008, actress Felisha Terrell filed a restraining order against the 6’4″, 220-lb. ballplayer — whom she had been living with — accusing him of threatening, intimidating and stalking her. In the papers, [she] states: “He is violent and I am afraid.”

Rihanna’s friends are afraid, too.

“You’d think after what she went through with Chris, RiRi would be extra careful about learning the background of any man she gets close to,” one of them tells Star. “It’s almost as if she has a dark side of her own — an attraction to bad boys.”

A “dark side” of her own? What is she, a fucking sith lord? Please. She’s a goddamn idiot, that’s what she is. And anyway, everybody knows there can only be two sith — a master, and an apprentice — according to the Rule of Two set forth by Darth Bane after he discovered the holocron of Darth Revan and disbanded the Brotherhood of Darkness, and Barack Obama and Nancy Pelosi secured those spots a long time ago. Next time check your facts, dummies!

Performing in Rockefeller Center with Jay-Z last month:

PHOTO SOURCE: Pacific Coast News Online, Bauer-Griffin Online

These photos of 29-year-old Christina Ricci in a bikini in Miami with her new boyfriend are really amazing. I mean, with all that forehead, you’d think they’d have to print a “to be continued” on every last one of the pics, but they somehow managed to fit all of it inside the frame. That’s some serious quality photography right there. I bet it’d be like watching a goddamn drive-in movie if you could see inside her head when she dreamed.

PHOTO SOURCE: Bauer-Griffin

Here are some more pictures of Sienna Miller getting her bikini on with some tool named “Slinky Wizard” in Ibiza last Friday. Why three-day old pictures of some second-rate actress in an un-see-through bikini? Because it’s not Kelly fucking Osbourne or naked Macy Gray, that’s fucking why. Jesus Christ. You can be so damn ungrateful sometimes. I’m not a machine, you know! At least not I figure out how to install the micro-miniature version of the Blue Gene/L that I ordered off the internet into the base of my spinal cord. All the stupid instructions were written in Chinese.

PHOTO SOURCE: Bauer-Griffin