Now that she’s kicked her whoremongering husband Jesse James to the curb, Sandra Bullock has a new man in her life — his name is Louis, and he’s black, and he hails from Ray Nagin’s magical Chocolate City. People Magazine says

Bullock reveals that she is the proud mother of Louis Bardo Bullock, a 3½-month-old boy born in New Orleans. Bullock, 45, and husband Jesse James, 41, began the adoption process four years ago and brought Louis home in January but decided to keep the news to themselves until after the Oscars. Their close friends and family – including James’s children Sunny, 6, Jesse Jr., 12, and Chandler, 15 – were essential in keeping the adoption a secret.

Then, just 10 days after the March 7 Oscars, Bullock and James separated following reports James had cheated. Bullock says she is now adopting as a single parent.

Wait — I think I already saw this one. She uses her spunky Bible Belt can-do attitude to raise him to be a good Christian pro football player while making some insightful self-discoveries of her own. Running time: 120 minutes. Rated PG-13 for brief violence, drug and sexual references.

UPDATE: Read Jesse James’ official statement about the divorce and adoption after the jump.

Jesse revisiting the ‘tard yesterday:

PHOTO SOURCE: Bauer-Griffin

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Brad Pitt is reportedly through with acting and gearing up to enter the political arena. Probably because Angelina told him to. The Daily Mail says

Sources in the Democratic Party say he has been approached to run for mayor of New Orleans. His decision to follow into politics would certainly explain the couple’s decision to buy a £2million home in the disaster-hit Louisiana city.

He has hired his own “philanthropic adviser” Trevor Neilsen, who worked for President Clinton’s Washington administration, to boost his humanitarian credentials and set up his own “Make It Right” campaign to build ecohomes in New Orleans’ Ninth Ward.

To think — a marshmallow running the “Chocolate City.” Now that’s unexpected! The hardest thing about that would be deciding which dark-skinned immigrant group got to be the graham cracker crust in your delicious racial metaphor. My pick? The Kurds.